BIBLIOGRAPHY DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL...
BIBLIOGRAPHY
DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013. Learning from the Past: Processes of
Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage in Tublay, Benguet. Benguet State
University, La Trinidad, Benguet.
Adviser: Filmore Y. Awas, MDevCom
ABSTRACT
This study aimed to determine the socio- demographic profile of the respondents,
document the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’, and determine the changes of
‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet, and the roles of elders in the process of ‘kalon’. Likewise, the
study aimed to determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay. As part
of the study the researcher produced a simple video documentary of the practice.
The data were obtained through personal interview with the key informants and
respondents using guide questions.
The results showed that though some of the respondents did not finish their
education, it did not affect their credibility of giving information about ‘kalon’ as their
years of stay in the area and their exposure to the said practice is what is more considered
in the study.
The processes in the practice of ‘kalon’ involved three-first different approaches as
follows: man’s choice, elders’ choice, and through parent’s betrothal. The entire threefirst
ways followed some of each other’s processes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Meanwhile, there were changes applied in the practice, during the ‘kalon’. The
changes were noted as: mambunongs/elders no longer officiate the marriage rites instead
it is now solemnized by a priest, judge or mayor; the couples are required to get a
certification of marriage from the municipal registrar’s office and if they got married in
church the couples should also have a church orientation/confirmation. Also, the kalon
proposal can be freely aborted. Further, ‘bilin’ is integrated at the wedding program; the
wedding expenses are financed by the couples and the liquor used by the ‘mengalon’ was
4x4 in replacement of ‘tapey’.
The roles of elders in the practice of ‘kalon’ were as: intermediary; ‘para-piltek ni
adak’ and ‘mamilin’ (adviser).
Majority of the respondents perceived that ‘kalon’ was advantageous because a shy
man was privileged to marry the woman she wants without direct courtship; both parties
know each other’s family track and that the couples know each other’s family background
; “Baaks” aged 35 to 45 or older can still get marry by the help of the ‘mengalon’; guidance
and advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples was always assured because the elders were
held responsible in the couples courtship and marriage; before, there were many successful
marriage through ‘kalon’ because the couples are afraid to separate in respect of their
‘mengalon’ or elders; rich families were betrothed to a rich family also.
Meanwhile, the reasons why the respondents perceived it as disadvantageous was
woman are at times forced to marry the man she does not love or like to be with and in
worst cases, in parents betrothal, both the man and woman were forced to get marry; love
between the couple was not readily established before marriage, although in most cases, it
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
developed through the years; and sometimes the process of betrothed marriage was the
cause of misunderstandings between the couple.
The researcher recommendeds that the practice of ‘kalon’ maybe maintained
though not all the processes maybe applied. As stated by some key informants and
respondents, there are still those man or ‘baaks’ who are waiting for the approach and help
of ‘mengalon’; high regards to elders in indigenous communities should still be maintained
however, how one must follow maybe taken into its proper context and application. Also,
cultural practices like ‘kalon’ should not be looked at as a ‘paganisitic’ way of doing things
but should be looked at as a way of creating a harmonious relationship between a man and
woman and/or among members of the community if done and observed properly and
appropriately. Moreover, study about the impact of ‘kalon’ on women in Ibaloi
communities and the general acceptance of such practice in the community may be
conducted in other Ibaloi communities where ‘kalon’ is still actively practiced and further
study on cultural practices of Tublay is recommended.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
INTRODUCTION
Rationale
Culture is an integral way and means of life. How it is being practiced and used in
different situations and how it affects one’s life have already become the center of study in
different fields of communication.
Culture, as cited by Samovar (2010), is a set of human objective and subjective
elements that in the past have increased the probability of survival and resulted in
satisfaction for the participants in an ecological niche, and thus become shared among those
who could communicate with each other because they had a common language and they
live in the same time and place.
The same source further explained that “although culture is not the only stimulus
behind behaviour, its omnipresent quality makes it one of the most powerful”. What makes
culture so unique is that you share your culture with other people who have been exposed
to similar experiences. In a sense, culture unites people with a frame of reference in a
society.
Philippines is one of the many countries with unique culture. The country consists
of 82 provinces with numerous cultural practices. Its richness in culture makes it highly
different and more prominent from other countries.
As noted by Abada (2007), Philippines have diverse customs, cultural heritage, arts,
traditions and spoken languages. One of the many practices that many Filipino families
still uphold up to this day is courtship. Usually, this is performed by the male (who is the
suitor) visiting the home of the female. Cordilerra is one of the regions of the Philippines
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
with notable engagement and marriage practices. In Benguet alone, several practices can
be noted depending on their ethno-linguistic group. There are two major ethno-linguistic
groups in Benguet: the Ibaloi and Kankanaey. Ibaloi occupies the southeast part of the
province and speak Nabaloy, with a linguistic sound nearer to Pangasinense. The Ibaloi
groups practice a traditional way of courtship and marriage called as ‘kalon’
Kalon is a practice whereby a man chooses a woman to marry without direct
courtship. According to the data of the National Commission on Indigenous People’s
(NCIP)-Benguet, ‘kalon’ started in 1950’s as a form of courtship and marriage of the
people in Benguet, partly the Ibaloi and Kankanaey. For some kankana-eys, they call it
‘kaon’.
Kalon occurs when a young man is interested in a girl, then he will ask an older
person ‘mengalon’ to visit the girl and ask her if she wants to marry the young man. If the
girl agrees, the wedding will immediately follow.
In an article published in Northern Dispatch by Fialen (2011) ‘kalon’ is being
practiced before to retain wealth of both families. One of the reasons of its practice, as cited
in the National Commission on Indigenous People’s (NCIP) Benguet (2012), is that the
parents want to remain family ties within two families.
Tublay is among few Ibaloi communities who rarely practice ‘kalon’. There are
what they call (old men) ‘baaks’ who are being encouraged by elders in the community to
get marry through ‘kalon’.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Given the importance of documenting processes in relation to one’s cultural
practice, this study is initiated. Documenting such while it is still being practiced is also
important as it may give insights to communication students as to how communication is
used in different context of culture.
Further, it is somehow important to see the changes that occurred in the practice
through time and how it is perceived by the present generation.
The study also highlights the role of elders in a community particularly in ‘kalon’ as a
mediator or communicator between two parties involved.
The study may also provide important insight for community reflection whether or
not to sustain such practice. In communication aspect, a reflexive evaluation is important
for a cultural practice that is seen to be pragmatic.
Statement of the Problem
The study sought to answer the following questions:
1. What are the socio-demographic profiles of the respondents?
2. What are the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay?
3. What are the changes in the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay?
4. What are the roles of elders in the practice of ‘kalon’?
5. How is ‘kalon’ perceived by the community of Tublay nowadays?
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Objectives of the Study
Generally, the study aimed to document the processes and rituals done during
‘kalon’.
Specifically the study aimed to:
1. determine the socio-demographic profile of the respondents;
2. document the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’;
3. determine the changes in ‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet;
4. determine the roles of the elders in the processes of ‘kalon’; and,
5. determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay.
Importance of the Study
The main purpose of the study is to document ‘kalon’ as a way of courtship and
marriage in Tublay, Benguet; to identify the processes being applied in the practice; the
changes done in the practice; and to identify how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community.
As a part of documentation, this study aimed to provide an audio-visual
documentation of the processes being performed in the . In this regard, the documentation
could be used by concerned organizations like National Center for Culture and Arts
(NCCA), NCIP and other policy makers as a point of reference. The documentation may
also serve as insight on some of the Ibaloi’s traditional way of marriage.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Scope and Limitations of the Study
The study focused only on the documentation of the processes involved in the
practice of ‘kalon’ nowadays, the changes occurred in the practice, the role of elders in the
practice of ‘kalon’ and how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay,
Benguet.
The study also presented five cases of ‘kalon’ that already happened.
A simple video documentary of the practice was produced as a part of the study.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
REVIEW OF LITERATURE
The Ibaloi’s
The respondents of the study are ‘Ibaloi’s’. They are one among the six major
ethno-liguistic groups in the Cordilerra Administrative Region (CAR) which is located in
the Northern Central Philippines. The others are Ifugao, Kankana-ey, Tingguan, Kalinga,
and Itneg. While the ‘Ibalois’ call themselves ‘Ibadoy’, they may also call themselves
‘Igodot’ which is the ‘Ibaloi’ pronunciation of ‘Igorot’. According to Dr. Trinidad Pardo
de Tavera, the word ‘Igorot’ is composed of the old Tagalog root word ‘golot’ meaning
mountain chain and the prefix “I” meaning “people of” or “dweller in” (Scott;1996). The
‘Ibalois’ are indigenous in the southern part of Benguet province where where Baguio City
is geographically located SmartSchools (2012).
According to the NCIP data posted on the official website of Benguet province
(2012), ‘Ibalois’ are also known as ‘Ipaway’ which means people living in valleys, plateaus
or somewhat sloping areas not covered with dense vegetation. For them, the term ‘paway’
means a place devoid of heavy vegetation.
This tribal group dominates the province of Benguet. Hence, when meeting lowland
people of other tribal groups, the ‘Ibalois’ would say, “We are Benguet people.”
Historically, They are the native inhabitants of the province.
The main occupation of the ‘Ibalois’ are farming and gardening. A very
hardworking people, they have succeeded in making La Trinidad, Benguet as the salad
bowl of the Philippines due to their abundant vegetable products like Baguio beans,
cabbage and Irish potatoes as well as strawberries NCIP (2012).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Kalon and its Processes
Kalon is the traditional way of courtship and marriage among the ‘Ibalois’; however
its processes as to how it is practiced differs from one place to another. When a young man
is interested in a girl, he will ask an older person to visit the girl and ask her if she wants
to marry the young man. If the girl agrees, the wedding will immediately follow NCIP
(2012).
In some places, the man sends a ‘mangadon’ to propose marriage to the woman
whose parents are notified of the marriage proposal. If the parents favour the man, they
help their children in convincing into accepting the marriage offer. So, with the prodding
of her parents and the gullible tongue of the ‘mangadon’, the offer of marriage may be
accepted Celino (1983).
This has been practiced by the ‘Ibalois’ since the early 50’s until the early 80’s. The
Ibaloi man need not to court a woman, instead the former chooses a woman he wants for a
wife and expresses his love through an intermediary with a good reputation in the
community and through parental agreement Fialen, (2011).
According to Lakay Bugawi as cited by Fialen (2011), almost all Ibaloi
communities practice ‘kalon’ which he thinks is good for the man because he can choose
the woman he likes without direct courtship. A respected individual intercedes in his behalf
including his parents who have to talk with the woman’s parents.
Celino (1983) narrated that the third party or intermediary talks about the man’s
good qualities so the woman gets to know the man who wants to marry her. One way to
determine if the woman likes the man is she agrees to drink the ‘tapey’ (rice wine) offered
by the intermediary. If she refuses, the proposal is aborted. Lakay Bugawi also revealed
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
that because of this practice, Ibaloi men have become dependent on other persons or on
their parents to court the woman they love. To begin with, many Ibaloi men are shy to court
and express their feelings of love. Eshakel paylaeng e ibadoi ja egto amtan mangashem,
ambaeng ton ekwan e ayat to isunga talaga emun shy kami mango Lakay Bugawi added.
According to him, one of the reasons for this practice before was for the rich clans
and families to keep their wealth within their class. Thus this agreement happens despite
the children wishes or decisions. Baknang koma ket para soni baknang ngo Fialen (2011).
Based on the study of Rivera (1988), the ‘kalon’ is generally done immediately
after the parents or when both partners of marriage reach their right age and have agreed
to the marriage. Normally an animal is butchered; usually a chicken or any animal cared
for.
As cited in the study of Rivera (1988), before the marriage ritual takes place in the
house of the man or the woman. A large male carabao is butchered for the wedding feast.
In the evening, one mail pig is slaughtered to coincide with the entrance of the bride and
groom into the house escorted by an elderly couple. At the door, the ‘mambunong’ blesses
them by pouring water over their knees and toes; prays for the couple’s life to be a long
one, full of bliss and prosperity.
After this, each occupies designated corners of the house the whole night, where
they listen to ‘bah’diw’ songs and advice of elderly people. The following day, another
male pig is killed and prepared as in a ‘kappi’ ritual. Early this day, the newlyweds wash
themselves in a spring of water as they embark for a new status in life. The groom takes a
bath in the upper portion of the river, while the bride washes herself in the lower portion.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
The practice of having the man occupy the upper portion of recognizes the husband as the
head of the family with the wife subordinating herself in matters affecting the family.
This completes the marriage ritual making the newly-weds husband and wife Rivera
(1988).
According to the dissertation of Celino (1983), the wedding takes eight days. The
eating and dancing may continue up to the eight day.
Changing Cultural Practices
Necessarily, some if not all practices have changed over the years. Our forefathers
have accepted the necessity of change even themselves making many adjustments to the
changing conditions of their own time. We can only empathize with the momentous
decisions needed by our forefathers as they decided to migrate to the place they have
imparted unto us as a domain NCIP (2012).
The culture of our forefathers also evolved, changed by the conditions of the
domain like the topography, the resources, the unseen forces and spirits in present-day
NCIP (2012).
One example is the courtship and marriage tradition of Bontoc, Mt. Province.
Traditional courtship was done in the ‘ulug’ and marriage was officiated by old men and
women at the bride’s residence then repeated at the bridegroom’s residence. Some
marriages were arranged by parents or relatives Ngodcho (2004).
Young maidens slept in the ‘ulug’ at night while their days were spent doing homes
chores or working in the fields or ‘kaingins’. The young men of the village visited them in
the ‘ulug’. The young men and women related stories sang and had fun together. A young
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
man who fell in love with a young lady may sleep with her in the ‘ulug’, with the presence
of the other young ladies. The young men and women were very much disciplined; hence,
no premarital relations existed. Discipline was one of the values learned in the ‘ulug’ on
the part of the ladies and in the ‘ato’ on the part of the gentlemen.
If the lady reciprocated the love of the man, then the two would tell their parents
Ngodcho (2004).
Ngodcho (2004) added that when they were about to be married, the marriage
ceremony was done at the bride’s residence. There, a pig was butchered. Old men and
women, some of the bride’s and bridegroom’s friends, and the family ate together.
Meanwhile, ‘kapya’ (prayer) for the good health and wealth of the newlywed couple was
recited by an old man or woman. The ‘kapya’ was offered to Kafunian/ Lumawig. In the
‘kapya’, the spirits of the dead relatives were also invited to dine with the family. That day,
a basket of cooked rice and meat was brought to the house of the bridegroom. If the parents
of the groom accepted the offer, it meant the bride was accepted by the groom’s family;
otherwise, no marriage would take place. With the acceptance of the offer by the groom’s
family, the same ceremonies would be done at the groom’s residence the following day.
During those days, the bride and the bridegroom should not wash their hands and should
not take a bath so that good luck would remain with them. Sexual intercourse during
those days was also a taboo (Ngodcho, 2004).
The said marriage practice was called “ensukat nan lokmog” which literally meant
“Exchanged of cooked sweet potatoes”.
Among the families, parental engagement was very common. Parents matched
their children when these children were still young. The rich married the rich so as to retain
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
their wealth which was in terms of rice fields, mountains, animals like carabaos and cows,
jars, glass beads and other precious materials Ngodcho (2004).
Today, courtship is no longer done in the ‘ulug’. ‘Ulugs’ disappeared in the middle
of the 1960’s. Courtship is done in the homes.
According to Ngodcho (2004) the disappearance of the ‘ulug’ is attributed to formal
education and Christianity, and also structure of the present houses. The Bontoc houses
nowadays are much bigger and can accommodate all members of the family. Most boys
and girls are going to school. They study and sleep in their homes.
The study added that native marriage ceremony is still being practiced but minus
the taboos like those on taking a bath and on sexual intercourse. In addition to the native
marriage ceremony, marriage is officiated by a judge or mayor and in church by a priest.
Marriage has therefore become a cultural, legal and religious rite.
Our knowledge systems and practices are often linked with our belief systems, and
are inseparable from each other. With the changes in belief systems like the adoption of
the Christian faith, some of the processes and systems would no longer be practiced NCIP
(2012).
NCIP (2012) further explained that even the other introduced knowledge systems
and practices from western influence have become part of our indigenous systems, as we
adopted them, it changed the very system of our culture they are now part of it NCIP
(2012).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Advantages of Cultural Practices
Most of the activities of daily life are accompanied by rituals and cultural practices
aimed at maintaining that relationship with, for example, the ancestors or nature. Cultural
practices relating to ancestors are particularly important because of the reciprocity existing
between living and deceased persons. The community depends on the goodwill and help
of ancestors through dreams and spiritual paths, and the ancestors need to be honoured
through appropriate ceremonies and maintenance of their burial places. Other cultural
practices relate to nature and intend to maintain the relationship with the other forces in
nature on which their success as farmers, hunters or pastoralists will depend United Nations
Educational Scientific and Cultural Organization-UNESCO, (2012).
For the development to be socially and economically sustainable, culture is also
taken into account but as civil organizations say it must be drawn upon the values, traditions
and cultures of the people in the countries and societies it serves.
Indigenous people’s cultures are self-sustaining and can guarantee indigenous people as a
sense of well-being UNESCO (2012).
Disadvantages of Some Cultural Practices
Constraints arising from cultural traditions often limit young people’s access to the
information and services they need to make informed and responsible decisions about their
sexual and reproductive lives World Health Organization (1996).
Some cultural traditions and expectations in some places can put disproportionate
constraints on girls and challenge the “physical and psychological health and integrity of
individuals. This is most evident in the practices of 1) marrying female children and very
young women and 2) female genital cutting (FGC), World Health Organization (1996).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Roles of Elders in Cultural Practices
Preserving our culture is the role of elders in the cultural resilience of native
communities Lewis (2008).
Native elders serve as teacher, mentor, family member, wisdom bearer, traditional
healer, and a role model in a community. They preserve language through teachings, teach
culture and traditions to youth, participate in tribal council, and preserve traditional way of
governing community (i.e tribal council, talking circles) Lewis (2008).
Traditionally, elders in northern Labrador held positions of influence in their
communities. As protectors of the community, they had the power to take an abused child
out of their home and they could ask people who disturbed the peace to leave the
community. These rights, however, were exercised in communities without established
authorities Evans (1997).
Definition of Terms
Ibaloi or Ibadoy. People of Benguet speaking Nabadoy, language close to
Pangasisnense.
Kalon. Is the traditional way of marriage which started on 1950’s. In English it
means to betroth.
Mengadon or ‘mengalon’. One who acts as a go-between a man and a woman
during a . One who does courtship in favour of the man. Usually an elder from the
community. Baaks. Olden men
Tafey. Rice wine offered by the ‘mengalon’ to the lady during a ‘kalon’ . Sign of
agreement to the proposal if she drinks.
Tulag. The final process of ‘kalon’. The man’s group will visit the woman.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
METHODOLOGY
Locale and Time of the Study
The study was conducted in Tublay, Benguet. Tublay is a 5th class municipality in
the province of Benguet. It is located 263 km north of Manila and 13 km north of Baguio
City. It has a land area of 57.3 km2, representing 2.2 % of the land area of Benguet. The
topography is generally mountainous with an elevation of 1400 meters above sea level. It
has two pronounced seasons-the dry and the wet seasons with a temperature coldest at 6.5
C and warmest at 27.5 C.
The municipality of Tublay have existing tourism resources specifically located in
the barangays of Ambongdolan, and Tuel. Some of the tourist spots are the Bengaongao
and Paterno cave located in Ambongdolan, Buasen Training Center and Winnaca Village
in Acop and Asin Hot spring in Tuel. There are also potential tourism resources for
development, which can be located in all the other barangays.
However, in the barangays where the tourist spots are found, tourists are housed
either by the residents themselves or in the rural health clinics or school buildings in the
area but this is through proper coordination with the barangay chairperson or barangay
officials, rural health midwife in the area and the Department of Education personnel.
The culture of the community is the same with other indigenous peoples whose lives and
traditions is a land-based culture.
Tublay was chosen as the locale of the study because it was observed that ‘kalon’ is still
being practiced there.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Tublay is politically subdivided into 8 barangays namely Barangay Basil, Ba-ayan, Tublay
Central, Daclan, Caponga, Ambassador, Tuel and Ambongdolan.
Figure 1. Map of the municipality of Tublay, showing the locale of study
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Respondents of the Study
The respondents of the study were divided into two groups: the five elders and
another five who experienced ‘kalon’who served as the key informants, ten community
members from Tublay who have the knowledge on the practice. They were chosen
purposively by the researcher. The criteria for choosing the key informants were as follows:
must be in the age of elder; must have the knowledge on the rituals and processes of ; must
have experience serving as mediator in . The criteria for choosing the respondents were as
follows: must be born Ibaloy (male or female); live within the barangay for not less than
25 years and must have knowledge on the rituals and processes of ‘kalon’.
Also, the researcher interviewed five persons who got married through .
Data Collection
The researcher gathered the data on the processes of ‘kalon’ through personal
observation. Aside from personal observation, the key informants and respondents were
interviewed personally with guide questions. The questions were translated to Ibaloi dialect
during the interview in order to aid understanding between the researcher and the
respondents.
Data Gathered
The data gathered focused on the socio-demographic profile of the respondents,
specifically their name, gender, age, occupation, address, religion and their educational
attainment, the processes in the practice of , changes in the practice in Tublay, Benguet,
roles of elders in the practice and how is perceived by the community. Also, the data
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
include five stories of ‘kalon’ which were retold by the interviewees who got married
through such practice.
Data Analysis
The data gathered were consolidated, tabulated and analyzed using descriptive
analysis and were presented in a narrative form.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
RESULTS AND DISCUSSION
This section presents the analysis and discussion of the data based on the objectives
of the study. It covers the socio-demographic profile of the respondents; processes involved
in the practice of ‘kalon’; changes in the practice of ‘kalon’, roles of elders in the practice
of ‘kalon’ and how is ‘kalon’ perceived by the community of
Tublay nowadays.
Socio-demographic Profile of the Respondents
There were twenty respondents of the study. Five of the twenty respondents were
elders who served as the key informants; five of them were those who experienced ‘kalon’.
The first five elders were chosen, as they were the ones recommended by the community
to be knowledgeable about the said practice for long. The researcher interviewed them
personally. The other ten respondents were community members who knew the practice of
‘kalon’.
Table 1 shows the socio-demographic profile of the key informants.
Key Informants. Table 1 shows the socio-demographic profile of the key
informants. As shown in the table, six were male and four were female who belonged to
age bracket 45 to 85. With regards to their educational attainment, one was able to graduate
college, four were able to graduate high school and the rest were either high
school/elementary undergraduate, elementary graduate, or did not enter formal education
at all. All of the key informants stayed in the community for more than 45 years from the
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
time of the study. Their educational backgrounds however do not affect their credibility
Table 1. Socio-demographic profile of the key informants
NAME SEX
AGE
ADDRESS
YEARS EDUCATIONAL OCCUPA-
(IN
OF
ATTAINMENT TION
TUBLAY)
STAY
Apili Albis
Male
83
Daclan,
83
Elementary
Farmer
Graduate
Kero Tibong
Male
76
Central
76
Elementary
Mangilot
Undergraduate
Gabriel Toribio
Male
52
Tuel
52
High School
Barangay
Graduate
Captain
Narcisa Buslay
Female 73
Daclan
73
High School
Baby Sitter
Graduate
Lideng Tomino
Female 80
Daclan
80
No Formal
Farmer
Education
Bernardo Sin-ot
Male
60
Daclan
60
Elementary
Farmer
Graduate
Lydia Albis
Female 64
Daclan
64
High School
Farmer
Graduate
Victor Dalgis
Male
49
Daclan
49
Vocational
Laborer
Graduate
Lourdes Dalgis
Female 48
Daclan
48
College
Farmer
Graduate
Mason Albis
Male
57
Daclan
57
High School
Farmer
Undergraduate
of giving information about ‘kalon’ as their years of stay in the area and their exposure to
the said practice is what is more considered in the study.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Furthere, the eight key informats belonged to Barangay Daclan while the other belonged
to Barangay Tuel and Central. Seven of the key informants stayed in the community for 45
to 75 years while the rest stayed for 76 to 85 years.
The key informants have occupations from Barangay Captain (1), farmer (6), baby
Sitter (1), laborer (1) and ‘mangilot’ (1). The elder key informants used to do ‘kalon’ when
they see olden men and women at around ages of 40-45 who were not yet married thus they
suggest to them to marry through the said practice. This is the usual way of ‘kalon’ done
in Tublay nowadays.
Community Respondents. Table 2 shows the socio-demographic profile of the
community respondents. Of the ten respondents, seven were female and three were male.
Five of them belonged to the age bracket of 25 to 40 while the other five belonged to the
age bracket of 41 to 65.
All of the respondents stayed for more than 25 years in different barangays of
Tublay, Benguet. With regards to their educational attainment majority (6) of them were
college graduates. The respondents were working either as farmers (3) laborer (2) teacher
(2) government employee (2) and plain housewife (1).
Table 2. Socio-demographic profile of the respondents (Community Members)
NAME
SEX
AGE ADRESS
YEARS EDUCATIONAL
OCCUPATION
(IN
OF
ATTAINMENT
TUBLAY)
STAY
Maurita Kinispil Female 54
Tili,
54
Elementary
Housewife
Daclan
Undergraduate
Loida Buslay
Female 32
Bangho
32
College
Teacher
graduate
Margarita Copete Female 31
Namudan
31
College
Farmer
graduate
Catalino Olida
Female 61
Tili,
61
Elementary
Farmer
Daclan
graduate
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Juan Esnara
Male
47
Posos,
47
College
Government
Central
graduate
employee
Agustina Anton Female 30
Bangho,
30
College
Teacher
Daclan
graduate
Abraham
Male
48
Caponga
48
College
Government
Lacaden
graduate
employee
Raquel Gabriel Female 33
Asin, Tuel
33
College
Laborer
graduate
Sheryl Sabado Female 25
Balangabang 25
High School Laborer
Tuel
Graduate
Mercedes
Female 55
Sayatan,
55
Elementary
Farmer
Alidong
Daclan
graduate
Processes Involved in the Practice of ‘Kalon’
There were three-first approaches of how ‘kalon’ is being practiced in Tublay,
Benguet according to the respondents as follows: man’s choice, elders’ choice, and
through parent’s betrothal. The processes in these approaches, according to the key
informants, may differ from one Ibaloi community to another. For easy discussion,
processes before, during and after the marriage were considered. These were all based on
the stories of the elders and the key informants who had experienced ‘kalon’ in the
community. Tables were presented for easy reading on the processes of ‘kalon’ so that the
readers who do not have ample time to read may just refer to the table. It will aid too much
time in reading. Also, figures were presented for easy visualization of the processes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Before the ‘Kalon’
Discussions here follow the three approaches of how ‘kalon’ is practiced before
the Tulag and marriage as narrated by the key informants.
Man’s choice. This approach is usually done if the man is brave enough to say what
he feels towards a certain woman and decides to seek assistance of a ‘mengalon’ (an elder
man or woman but usually man) to get the approval of that woman. The processes in this
approach is shown in Table 3.
On the other hand, Figure 2 also shows the re-enacted communication between the
‘mengalon’ and the man. In the figure, the man informed the ‘mengalon’ about the woman
he wanted or interested with. He would say “piyan ko si (name of the woman) et nu
mibidin kuma atngi mowak ga, itavtaval mowak nu sanno piyan to. (I am interested with
this woman. Can you help me court her?). After this, the ‘mengalon’ would form a group
of elders to help him convince the girl.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Table 3. The processes done before the ‘kalon’ (Man’s Choice)
SOURCE
MESSAGE
CHANNELS
RECEI-
FEEDBACK
USED/
VER
MEDIUM OF
TRANSMISSI
ON
Man (Will
Piyan ko si (name of the
Verbal
Mengalon
If the ‘mengalon’ is
inform the
woman) et nu mibidin kuma
willing to help the
‘mengalon’
atngi mowak ga, itavtaval
man, he/she will
about the
mowak nu sanno piyan to.
form a group or call
woman he is (I am interested with this
for a group of elders
interested
woman. Can you help me
to help him
with)
court her?).
convince the woman
If the parents and
Man (Will
Tayo kedunen si (Name of
Verbal
Man’s
concerned relatives
inform his
the woman) nu haman ja
Parent
agree with the date
parents
akew” (We will visit the
of visitation, the
about the
woman on this day).
man informs the
date of
‘mengalon’ about
visitation to
the date of
the
visitation.
woman’s
house)
Verbal
If the woman’s
Mengalon
Endaw kami di nu haman ja
Woman’s
parent wants her
daughter to be
(Will inform akew, mi di bisitaen hata
Parent
betrothed, he will
the
balasang jo (We will come
agree to the offer of
woman’s
and visit your lassy on this
the ‘mengalon’
parent about day
their
visitation
Figure 2. The man communicates with the ‘menga lon’ about the woman he is interested
with (re-enactment).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
In some cases, the ‘mengalon’ may not call for a company (other elders) to
convince the woman if he/ she think he/she can do the convincing.
On the other side, the man will inform his parents about the date of visitation to the
woman’s house (Figure 3). The usual message relayed says, “tayo kedunen si (Name of
the woman) nu haman ja akew” (We will visit the woman on this day).
When the parents and concerned relatives agree with the date, the man informs the
‘mengalon’ about the date of visitation. The ‘mengalon’ then informs the date of visitation
to the woman’s parents for them to be ready.
This approach happened to Mason Albis-Adelyn and Albiso Albis-Lydia. Mason
and Adelyn had their ‘kalon’ on 1979. Mason’s elder relative was the one who served as
his ‘mengalon’.
Figure 3. The man talks with his parents about the date of the visitation to the woman’s
house(re-enactment).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
When they had their ‘kalon’, his parents accompanied Mason. According to
Mason, he personally talked to the ‘mengalon’ to accompany him and his family to visit
the girl. When both parties came to an agreement, the ‘mengalon’ opened the pair of
bottled wine for everybody to drink. The drinking of a wine symbolizes the agreement
between the man and the woman to be together as husband and wife.
In the case of Albiso Albis, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1970. According to Albiso,
as told by Lydia, Albiso saw him in a farm. When Albiso saw him, he got interested to
her and so he informed his parents that he wants Lydia. Albisos’ parents then called for a
‘mengalon’ who is their neighbor namely Jose Kinispil and Antonio Sin-ot. Being the first
child during their time, Albiso offered ‘noang’ as his offering of love to Lydia.
The offering (usually animals), according to the respondents, is not mandatory and
usually depends on the man courting.
Elders choice. This approach or option was usually done when elder/s in the community
notices/notice some ‘baaks’ (olden men and/or women who have not married yet) in the
community. Table 4 shows the processes in this approach.
In different occasions when an elder spotted these ‘baaks’, they encourage them
to marry through ‘kalon’. The elder/s usually asked: “piga la tawen mo, apay egka paylang
mengasawa? Piyan mun shaha ibeka/ikalon sun ________[Name of the woman]?” (How
old are you now, why are you not married yet? Do you want __________ [Name of the
woman] so that we will betroth her to you?). If the man agrees, the ‘mengalon’ then
advices the man to tell his parents about the visiting to the woman’s house.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
This applies not only for the ‘baaks’. In some cases, the elders still betroth if they
thought the man and woman were able to support their family in the future. In this case,
not only elders can push a man and woman to be together through ‘kalon’ but also those
Table 4. The processes done before the ‘kalon’ (through the elders choice)
Sender
Message
Channel
Receiver Feedback
Used/ of
Medium
Transmission
Elder
Piga la tawen mo, apay Verbal
Man
If the man agrees,
egka
paylang
the ‘mengalon’ then
mengasawa?
Piyan
advices the man to
tell his parents about
mun shaha
the visiting to the
ibeka/ikalon sun (Name
woman’s house.
of the woman)?” (How
old are you now, why
are you not married yet?
Do you want (Name of
the woman) so that we
will betroth her to
you?).
who were older than those being pushed to get married.
This approach happened to the three couples namely: Bernardo and Victoria Sinot,
Victor and Lourdes Dalgis, and Fabian and Virginia Alos.
For Victoria and Bernardo Sin-ot, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1980. These couple’s
‘kalon’ was a surprise, as narrated by Bernardo. Unknowingly, he was betrothed without
his notice. His older cousins, Tsino and Sebio, were the one who choose the girl for him.
Bernardo, as he recalled with a laugh, narrated his story this way:
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
“Egkak amta ey in sha ak gayam ‘inkalon’. Pinsak mamashem ja wara eres manong Tsino
tan manong Sebio shi baley, masdaawak ni apay ira ka en ngengenge , kwan sha ey (mayat
waray mi di kinalon). Mayat ngengenge an sha. Et sikak ngon egkak amta ei sikak gayam
so sha inkalon nak mekengengenge. Shinemag ko nu sipa sota sha kinalon tan nu enmowen
sota bee, egsha inkwan, “basta” e insungbat sha tan (piyan met nunta bee). Idi palabas
showen akew, masdaawak ni apay kwan ira manong Tsino ey kami kuno mengda pafel mi
nin Victoria shi munisipyo. Nak mantemtemulang ma ah ta kibtotak ey haman shagus
inkwan sha, egkak amta insungbat ko ni nan nemnemnemak nin. Asan sha ma ikwan ey
sikam sota mi ngengenge e nunta nashem ja mi intulag sun Victoria. Tadta, shinemag sha
ak mwan, nu ituloy kon esewa-en si Victoria. Enmowenak mala ah ta naksheng metlang
jen naytultulag” (I never expected that I was betrothed. One afternoon, my older cousins,
Tsino and Sebio, visited me in our house. Suddenly, they were laughing and telling story
that they just (betrothed) someone. Their laugh was so loud and I was cheerily laughing
with them not knowing that I was the one whom they betrothed with a woman. I asked my
cousins who they betrothed and what the woman had said. They answered me “secret” with
regards to who the man is but the woman said “yes”. After two days, I was surprised why
Manong Tsino and Manong Sebio were saying that I and Victoria will go to the municipal
office. I wondered and was muted with what they have just said. I didn’t know how to
respond to what they were saying. After a while, they already said that I was the one they
were pertaining to when they went to our house. All of a sudden, they asked me if I would
pursue their tulagan (agreement) with Victoria. Since she said “yes” to my two cousins and
betrothal was done, I had nothing to do but to say “yes”, in return.)
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Now, this couple is happily married and an active member and leader in a certain
Church in Tublay.
In the case of Virginia and Fabian, who had their ‘kalon’ in 1985, the one who
served as their ‘mengalon’ was Virginia’s older cousin named Rogel. As narrated by
Virginia, Rogel asked her if she liked to be betrothed to Fabian and she answered back
“shamag jo nin sikato a nu piyan towak ngo” (you ask him first if he likes me, too). After
this, Rogel visited Fabian and asked him if he wanted me to be his wife. Fabian said “yes”
and so they visited Virginia together with his parents. As stated, Virginia accepted the
agreement by just being silent and drank the ‘tapey’ offered by the ‘mengalon’.
According to her, silence during those times meant “yes”, so goes the common saying,
“silence means yes”.
Meanwhile, for Victor and Lourdes, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1992. The one who
served as their ‘mengalon’ was Victor’s cousin named Marciana, who was also Lourdes’s
friend. According to Lourdes, there was no formal talk between her relatives and the man’s
relatives during their ‘kalon’. In their case, the ‘kalon’ was done when Lourdes visited her
friend, Marciana, in Baguio. As stated by Lourdes, while they were telling stories,
Marciana suddenly talked about his cousin, Victor, and asked her “ento piyan mo si Victor
oh? Asavam ga et (You like Victor, don’t you? I suggest you marry him). Lourdes
answered “piyan towak ngo ngata aya”. With this, Marciana already understood that
Lourdes was just okay to marry Victor if ever. After this, Marciana told Victor that she
already (tulag) betrothed him to Lourdes. She advised Victor to often visit Lourdes in their
house. Victor did this until she won the feelings of Lourdes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
It took a long time when Victor and Lourdes formally got married since Lourdes
decided to work first before getting married. Victor’s sister, Aurora, who happened to be
Lourdes’s friend and classmate in college, was fun of teasing her brother to Lourdes the
reason why she also helped in convincing Lourdes to marry her brother. According to
Victor, there was a problem encountered after their ‘kalon’. When he informed his mother
that he will marry in Sayatan, her mother almost retreated saying that“eshahel too shi
Sayatan et baka egshu kayen pekanen era,” (there are a lot of people in Sayatan and you
may not be able to feed them all during your wedding). Victor was doubting and thinking
about what her mother told him so he had to decide whether or not to continue visiting
Lourdes. He approached Marciana, who acted as the ‘mengalon’ and she told him to help
in financing the wedding; thus, the problem was solved. The marriage was made in May
1992.
Parent’s betrothal. This approach is done when a parent who has a son/daughter
who is not yet married (bachelor) and will meet a parent who has also a bachelor, they
agree to inter-marry (kalon) their bachelor son/daughter. For some cases when a parent
wants a parent to be his/her in-law he/she will talk to that favored parent that they will
inter-marry their unmarried son/daughter.
The message usually says “Kumare/Kumpare waray anak mun eg paylaeng
engasava oh? Piyan mun man asava ga et ira nima anak kun balasang/baro? Pan aspol ta
ira nu man piniyanan ira (Friend, isn’t it that you have a bachelor son/daughter? Would
you want to inter-marry him/her to my daughter/son, so that they will meet if they would
like each other?)
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
This approach could be done anywhere or accidentally, usually during occasions in
the community where parents met and had discussions and consensus or agreement.
According to the respondents, before, this way of ‘kalon’ was considered as “rich for rich”
marriage; however, such notion was already discarded this time. This finding was
supported by the statement of Lakay Bugawi as stated by Fialen (2011) that one of the
reasons for the practice before was for the rich clans and families to keep their wealth
within their class. Baknang koma ket para soni baknang ngo (The rich should also be for
rich).
When the parents come with an agreement, they will inform and convince their
son/daughter to marry each other. As stated by Apili Albis, one of the key informants, this
practice was done forcedly and even without the decision of the betrothed man and woman
before but such case is no longer done today. The finding of forcing a man and woman to
get marry by their parents coincides with the statement of Lakay Bugawi, as cited by Fialen
(2011), that the agreement happens regardless if their children do not agree with their
decisions.
During the ‘Tulag’ and Wedding Proper. This is the eventual stage in the process
of ‘kalon’. The entire three-first ways follow some of each other’s processes.
Man’s choice. Table 5 shows the processes in this approach. For ‘kalon’ under this
approach, the man, together with his parent/s, the ‘mengalon’ and interested relatives if
there are, visits the house of the woman. This is also shown in Figure 4. They bring with
them any liquor, usually 4x4 as material used by the ‘mengalon’. In the old practice, rice
wine was being used. The liquor is a symbol of the “YES” and agreement of the woman to
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
the ‘kalon’ offer. The ‘mengalon’ will talk in behalf of the man. The message usually says,
“Kinaet mi dis (Name of the man) or dinmaw kami di ta mi ekedon si (Name of the man).
Inun-an toha et piyan toha kuno jan asava-en. Et ibag-an shaha nu piyan mo ngo sikato?”
(We visited because this guy is interested to you and she wants to marry you. Now we want
to ask you if you also want him).
Oftentimes, when the woman is seen hesitated to accept the offer, the ‘mengalon’
talks about the good qualities of the man.
In some cases, when the woman’s parents really want the man, they help the
‘mengalon’ in convincing their daughter. This set-up corroborates with the
statement of Celino (1983) that if the parents favors the man, they help their children in
convincing into accepting the marriage offer. Rare are the times that a woman dislikes the
‘kalon’ offer. According to Narcisa Buslay, one of the key informants, women before was
afraid to say “no” to the ‘kalon’ offer because some elders cursed if they would not obey
them.
Figure 4. The man, together with his mother and the ‘mengalon’ (real) visits the house of
the woman (re-enactment)
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
One way to determine if the woman accepted the ‘kalon’ offer was when she
agreed to drink the liquor offered by the intermediary (Figure 5). If she refused, the
proposal is cancelled. This finding is supported by the statement of Celino (1983) that
one way to determine if the woman likes the man is when she agrees to drink the ‘tapey’
(rice wine) offered by the intermediary.
Figure 5. The woman drinks the liquor offered by the ‘mengalon’ (re-enactment)
The wine is prayed over by the ‘mengalon’ before giving it to the woman.
This process is called ‘piltek’. The ‘mengalon’ throw a little of the liquor and pray
for more blessings and better understanding of the betrothed individuals. Usually, the
‘mengalon’ says in translated version, “Hayay jan naikalon ja shuwa, safay kuma ta
takshelan sha e pansaksahey sha. Ishawat ko ngarud e mapteng tan edagsak ja biyag son
sikayo” (May this betrothed couple be true to their promises in this ‘kalon’. May they be
progressive and happy during your married life). After this, both parties talk and set date
again for the wedding plans. This is the end of the ‘tulag’ and it is expected that everything
is already agreed upon between both parties. Wedding proper followed next.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Marriage rites took place either in churches officiated by a priest or pastor, in the
municipal office officiated by the mayor or judge, or could also be in the woman’s house.
When the marriage rites took place in church or in the municipal office, the reception
usually took place in the woman’s house. At present, during the wedding program, which
is done after lunch, Ibalois of Tublay still have the old process by which the ‘bilin’ or
‘pamagbaga’ in ilokano (words of advice) by the principal sponsors, elders or any
respected individuals in the community. In the old practice, they do it through ‘ba’diw’;
however, today, they only speak during the program. Some may also do it through a song.
The one who does the ‘bilin’ utter some words of advice to the couples. When the program
ends, the couples would enter the house and escorted by pair of their sponsors (Figure 6).
Usually as stated by Albis, one of the key informants the couples enters the house before
sunset. The wedding takes in two days.
Figure 6. The couples enter the house escorted by a pair of sponsors
The elder’s choice. ‘Tulag’ and wedding under this approach is similar with that
of the first approach. Its communication process is shown in Table 6.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
The man, with his parents (if they wished to go) and the ‘mengalon’ visits the
house of the woman to do the tulag/kalon. The ‘mengalon’ will talk in behalf of the man.
The message usually says “dinmaw kami ale ta kinaet mi dis (Name of the man) (we came
because we accompanied (Name of the man). “Kursunada toha kunun esavaen isunga
ibag-an shaha nu piyan mo ngo sikato” (She wants to marry you so we want to ask you
also if you want him too). For the olden men and women who were engaged, the
‘mengalon’ would say,
“entoy sikayo kayo met da mangkafahay/ mangkabakol ey entoy egjo paylaeng
pengasavaan, isunga di wara engekuwan ey pantulag shahayo et, sunga sikato iyay,
tinavtaval mi nin si (man) nu piyan toha et kwanto met ey wen. Sunga niman ibag-an
shaha ngo (woman) nu piyan mo si iyay (man), (why is it that you are getting old but still
not married,
that’s why when somebody told us that we will betroth you, this is it, the
reason why we are here; but first we ask (Name of the man) if he likes you
and he said yes. So we will ask you (Name of the woman) if you want him
too).
If the girl accepted the offer of the ‘mengalon’ or wanted the man, she would drink
the liquor offered by the ‘mengalon’.
Before the woman will drink, the ‘mengalon’ do first the ‘piltek’ wherein he
prays over and ask wishes for the couple. The ‘mengalon’ throw a little of the wine.
Similar prayer in the first approach is being uttered here. Wedding proper followed next
after the agreement.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Like the first approach, the marriage rites took place either in churches officiated
by a priest or pastor, in the municipal office officiated by the mayor or judge or could also
be in the woman’s house. When the marriage rites took place in church or in the municipal
office the reception usually took place in the woman’s house. At present, ‘bilin’ by the
principal sponsors, elders or any respected individuals is being practiced in replace of
‘bah’diw’, which is rarely done, according to the respondents. Message may also be
delivered through a song. The one who does the ‘bilin’ utter some words of advice to the
couple. When the program ends, the couple would enter the house escorted by pair of their
sponsors. The wedding celebration usually lasted for two days.
These processes followed the same process in the man’s initiation. The only addition done
in this process was the talk of the elder when the engaged man and woman were older. The
message goes this way: “entoy sikayo kayo met da mangkafahay/ mangkabakol ey entoy
egjo paylaeng pengasavaan, isunga di wara engekuwan ey pantulag shahayo et, sunga
kato yay, tinavtaval mi nin si (Name of the man) nu piyan toha et kwanto met ey wen. Sunga
niman ibag-an shaha ngo (Name of the woman) nu piyan mo si iyay (why is it that you are
getting old but still not married, that’s why when somebody told us that we will betroth
you, this is it, the reason why we are here; but first we ask (Name of the man) if he likes
you and he said yes. So we will ask you (Name of the woman) if you want him too).
Parent’s initiative. When the man’s family was ready for the visitation in the woman’s
house, his parents would call for a ‘mengalon’ to help them ask the woman and convince
both the man and woman to marry. This process is shown in Table 7. The ‘mengalon’ used
his or her gullible tongue to convince the man and woman. The message usually says,
“nantulag e parents jo ja pan asava shahayo et sikak ibag-an shahayo ngo (man and
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
woman) nu tungpalen jo ngo ira” (your parents agreed to inter-marry you and I as
‘mengalon’ would like to ask if you would follow your parents’ wishes. Usually, when the
man and woman stays in the same community, the ‘mengalon’ says “mayat et ita nantulag
day nanang wenno tatang jo et taga-shiyay kayo pay jen showa say am-amta yo et e sahey
tan sahey tan hata paykamangan jo metlang” (it’s even better that your parents did the
betrothal for you and that you stay in the same community so you already know each other
and each family background).
Sometimes, the ‘mengalon’ also adds “aven enges to sota eshom ja dapdapu alid
kumpurmin ili inas asava sha et egsha amta ey wara gayam day asava nunta enasava sha,
wenno sota eshom ket eg mankinkina- awatan ugadi sha, ira manbekbekal et mansina ma
sota eshom” (unlike the others that their husband or wife came from other places and they
don’t know that their husband/wife is already married or there are those Table 7. The
process done during ‘kalon’ (through the parent’s initiative)
Sender
Message
Channel
Receiver
Feedback
Used/Medium
of
Transmission)
Mengalon “Nantulag e parents jo Verbal
The
When the man and
ja pan asava shahayo et
betrothed
the woman was
sikak ibag-an shahayo
man and
convinced to the
ngo (man and woman)
woman
‘mengalons’
nu tungpalen jo ngo ira”
(your
persuading words,
parents agreed to inter-
the usual drinking
marry you and I as
of liquor followed
‘mengalon’ would like
by
the
to ask if you would
‘mengalon’s’
follow your parents’
prayer is done.
wishes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
some that because they do not understand each other’s attitude, they always quarrel, they
lead to separation.)
When the man and the woman was convinced to the ‘mengalons’ persuading
words, the usual drinking of liquor is done followed by the ‘mengalon’s’ prayer. This is
the end of the ‘tulag’ and it is expected that everything was already agreed upon between
the both parties. After this, both parties talked and set date for the wedding. This process
also occurred in the two approaches explained above.
Same as the two approaches, the marriage rites took place either in churches
officiated by a priest/pastor, in the municipal office officiated by the mayor/judge or could
also be in the woman’s house (garden wedding). Same process follows and usually
lasted for two days, too.
After the Kalon. Regardless of what approach was used, the couples were advised
to stay at home for three days to one week after marriage. They were not allowed to work
in the farm. This is what the elders call ‘ngilin’. According to Apili Albis, one of the key
informants, the couples are advised to do the ‘ngilin’ so that they will not see any wrong
or negative implications in marriage like snakes or chickens that are fighting. Albis said
that as the elders believe, these negative implications if seen may cause threat to the
marriage of the couples. The couples often than not obey this custom with a belief that
they will have progressive and fortunate life.
All the processes stated in the examples, are still the same process being practiced
today. However, the researcher was not able to interview the chosen couples who recently
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
got married through ‘kalon’ because these individuals were not present during the data
gathering.
Changes in the Practice of Kalon
All the respondents stated that there were many changes occurred in the practice of
‘kalon’. These changes were noted in Table 8.
According to the key informants, these changes are usually observed during the ‘kalon’.
Instead of rice wine or ‘tapey’ as a material used by the ‘mengalon’, any liquor, usually
4x4, is used. According to Esnara, this is due to unavailability of ‘tapey’ during ‘kalon’.
‘Tapey’ takes an effort to be produced; thus, its availability during immediate ‘kalon’
may not be available.
In terms of the woman or man’s refusal to be married using the parent’s decision as an
approach, today’s ‘kalon’ respects the decision of their child. Some respondents
Table 8. Changes applied in the practice of ‘kalon’
Old Practice
Present Practice
Marriage is officiated by a ‘mambunong’ At the night of the wedding, the couples
or an elder and the marriage rites are done are positioned in one corner of the house
at the house of the girl.
then the elders do the ‘bah’diw’.
‘Bah’diw’ is the form of ‘bilin’ to the
couples.
Marriage done by elders is said to be The marriage is officiated by either a
enough tie or bond for the couples to be priest, pastor, mayor or judge and the
called legally married, there is no need for marriage rites are done in churches, some
official papers from the church or the may occur also in the woman’s house but
registrar’s office
still it is officiated by a priests (garden
wedding). The reason for this change as
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
stated by Buslay, one of the key
informants is that because of one’s
religious belief system. Pagan rites are
slowly vanishing and the Christian beliefs
and ways replaced these ideals.
The proposal is rarely aborted because of Everyone says that it is still necessary that
the respect/obedience of the woman to the couples should get a certification of
elders (‘mengalon’). Also, as stated by marriage from the municipal registrar’s
Buslay, one of the key informants, the office and if they got married in church the
woman before was afraid of the cursed of couples should also have a church
Toribio, one of the key informants, he said orientation/confirmation. According to
that people today are educated; thus, they freedom and rights since almost all of
already know how things are being done them were educated.
following a process considered as “legal”
in this present generation.
The proposal can be freely aborted. The ‘Bilin’ is integrated at the wedding
woman or individuals today can assert program, after having lunch. The ‘bilin’
their right to say “No” to the ‘kalon’ offer. can be done by the ninonngs/ninangs of
As stated by some of the respondent’s the couples, elders and respected
individuals in the community. They
women today are more assertive of their
would speak some pieces of advice for
the couples fr the betterment and progress
of their marriage life. Some may also do
it through a song.
During the ‘kalon’ , rice wine (tapey) is Any liquor usually 4x4 is the liquor
offered to the woman as a sign of “yes” offered to the woman. The reason for the
answer to the ‘mengalon’.
replacement of ‘tapey’ into 4x4 is that
‘tapey’ takes an effort to be produced;
thus, its availability during immediate
‘kalon’ may not be available.
The wedding expenses are sponsored by The wedding expenses are financed by
the ‘mengalon’ or elders who were the couples.
involved during the ‘kalon’.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
said that woman today are more assertive of their freedom and rights since almost all of
them are educated. As stated by Catalino, one of the respondents, “if the old practice says,
obey what the parents or elders say, children of today are already entitled to their own
decision and that they can correct their parents if they think their thoughts are correct
(translated statement).”
Furthermore, a ‘mambunong’ or elders no longer solemnize marriage instead; it is
officiated by a priest, pastor, mayor or a judge. As stated by Buslay, one of the key
informants, one’s religious belief system is the reason why this old practice is changed.
Pagan rites like the marriage through ‘mambunong’ are slowly vanishing while the
Christian beliefs and ways replaced these ideals. This finding is supported by the article
of NCIP (2012) that because of the changes in belief systems like the adoption of the
Christian faith, some processes and systems in cultural practices would no longer practice.
Meanwhile, marriage done by the elders is said to be enough to tie or bond the
couples to be called “legally married”, but in this time, couples are required to get a
certification of marriage and church confirmation if married in church. Toribio, one of the
key informant, said that people today are educated; thus, they already know how things
are being done following a process considered as “legal” in this present generation. He
also added that the other reason for the changes is modernization. This was supported by
the statement of Awas (2009) in his study entitled: Staged Bendian as a Medium of
Community Dialogue and Action for Development and Cultural Integrity in
Contemporary Kabayan, Benguet, Philippines that as culture is ever-dynamic so it
changes with the modern time (modernization).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Also, before, at the night of the wedding, the couples are positioned in one corner
of the house with the elders doing the ‘bah’diw’ as a form of ‘bilin’ to the couples but
now, the ‘bilin’ is done during the wedding program, usually after after having the lunch.
Wedding expenses are also sponsored by the couple and not the ‘mengalon’ or elders who
initiated the engagement.
Vanished Processes in the Practice
These vanished processes were practiced during the early 1960s, according to
Albis; thus, the following activities were not observed during the time of the couples
interviewed in this study. It can be noted that the couples interviewed for this study did
not mention such however, they were knowledgeable of these vanished practice in the
process of ‘kalon’.
After the ‘ngilin’. After the five days of ‘ngilin’, the couples go out to their house.
The woman goes to the farm to get ‘camote’ sweet potato or harvest rice in the fields
while the man goes in the forest to get wood. When they arrive at home, the man passes
his gathered woods to the woman and the woman passes also his harvested ‘camote’ or
rice to the man. After this, the couple takes a bath at their yard at the same time and utter
prayers for their long life. According to Lideng Tomino, one of the key informants, this
symbolizes that whatever problems or difficulties the couples will undergo they will still
help each other. In addition, it will symbolize progress in their life.
With cases of pre-marital sex. According to Lourdes Dalgis, one of the respondents,
another vanished process in the practice is when the man and woman had pre-marital sex
before the marriage. If such was the case, they were required to butcher one pig before the
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
wedding. If both parties would not be able to provide one pig, a ‘mambunong’ or an elder
would get one egg, pray for it and burry it on the soil.
The forced practice. When the man does not like the woman, he is tied and ordered
to stay with the house of the woman. In some cases, the man and woman are locked in one
room.
Roles of Elders in the Process of ‘Kalon’
Intermediary. The elders served as intermediary ‘mengalon’ between the man and the
woman. The elder/s talk to the woman in behalf of the man. He/she tries to convince and
persuade the woman to marry the man using his gullible tongue.
Para-piltek ni adak. When the woman wants the man and she agrees to drink the
liquor, the elder would utter a minute of prayer for the couples. This is called ‘piltek’.
Mamilin (Adviser). During and after the ‘kalon’, the elders always advice the
couple to be good to each other, understand each other and give some pieces of advices for
the happiness of the couple. As stated by some of the respondents, this is the reason why
they said that ‘kalon’ is still relevant; the elder’s guidance and advices to the couples they
betrothed is expected. The elders are held responsible for the good relationship of the
couples because they were the one who betrothed them. This result was supported by the
statement of Lewis (2008) that native elders serve as teacher, mentor, family member, wisdom
bearer, traditional healer, and a role model in a community.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Respondent’s Perception in the Practice of ‘Kalon’
Among the 20 respondents of the study, eleven claimed that ‘kalon’ is
advantageous in the community and nine claimed that it is disadvantageous.
Advantages. The key informants and respondents stated different reasons why they
claimed that ‘kalon’ is advantageous. The reasons were as follows: (1) a shy man is
privileged to marry the woman she wants without direct courtship, he asked a help of a
‘mengalon’ or his older relatives; (2) both parties know each other’s family track and that
the couples know each other’s family background because they belong to one community;
(3) “Baaks” ages 35 to 45 or older can still get marry by the help of the ‘mengalon’; (4)
guidance and advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples is always assured because the
elders are held responsible in the couples courtship and marriage; (5) before, there are
many successful marriage through ‘kalon’ because the couples are afraid to separate in
respect of their ‘mengalon’ or elders; (6) rich families are betrothed to a rich family also.
This corroborates with the article of Fialen (2012) as stated by Bugawi that one of the
reasons for the ‘kalon’ practice before was the rich clan and families to keep their wealth
within their class.
The first advantage mentioned is supported by the article of Fialen (2012) as stated
by Lakay Bugawi that “Ibaloi men have become dependent on other person or on their
parents to court the woman they love.” Wara faylaeng e ebadoi ja egto amtan mengeshem,
ambaeng ton ekwan e ayat to isunga talaga emun shy kami mango (There are still Ibaloi
men who are shy to court and express their feelings of love; thus, this practice still exist).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Disadvantages. The nine respondents stated four reasons why they claimed that
‘kalon’ is disadvantageous. These disadvantages were as follows: (1) woman are at times
forced to marry the man she does not love or like to be with and in worst cases, in parents
betrothal, both the man and woman are forced to get marry; (2) love between the couple
is not readily established before marriage, although in most cases, it developed through
the years; (3) sometimes the process of betrothed marriage is the cause of
misunderstandings between the couple.
Perception on its continuation. When the 20 respondents were asked if they think
‘kalon’ is still relevant in today’s generation, majority (11) said that ‘kalon’ is still
applicable and relevant to the community because there are still those ‘baaks’ who are
waiting for the help of ‘mengalon’. There are still elders who pity olden men who are not
yet married thus they encourage them to marry through ‘kalon’. This approach is often
practiced in Tuel. With these statements, it can be said that the practice still has a chance
to be prolonged, though rarely will it happen.
On the other hand, nine of the respondents said that ‘kalon’ is no longer relevant
supposed to be, because the women and men today are the ones choosing their husband.
As stated by Gabriel Toribio, one of the key informants, the forced marriage
through ‘kalon’ before is no longer practiced because woman today are educated,
information about rights and freedom is budding. However practiced, the woman of today
has the full authority to say “no” to the ‘mengalon’. Toribio added that woman already
know how are things be made legal in the name of our written law, like for example before
if the marriage can be officiated by the elders, nowadays the couples are required to get a
legal authorization of marriage either from the church-priest, municipal office-mayor or
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
judge. This was supported by the statement of Narcisa Buslay that pagan rites like the
marriage through ‘mambunong’ are slowly vanishing while the Christian beliefs and ways
change these ideals.
It can be noted from the above findings that ‘kalon’ though already an old aged
custom, is still practiced in Tublay especially in barangay Tuel and generally perceived
as applicable and relevant.
Its relevance was strengthened by one key informant who stated that “angken niman
in-inut ja mangka enshe eh ‘kalon’ wara ladta sota mengedon tan maykalon. Nu waray
as asen ni kakaidian ja mankabaake shaha ekwan wenu mengebetkag ira ey jo kare ikalon
si man sun woman (Even if this practice is vanishing, it will still and still be performed
because if any ‘kakaidian’ community member saw some olden men or women ‘baaks’
or not aging 30’s but don’t know how to court a girl they tell or talk to someone to
betrothed them).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
SUMMARY, CONCLUSIONS AND RECOMMENDATIONS
Summary
Generally, the study was conducted to document the processes involved in the
practice of ‘kalon’, determine the changes in ‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet, determine the
roles of elders in the process of ‘kalon’ , and determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the
community of Tublay.
There were twenty respondents of the study, five elders and five who experienced
‘kalon’ served as the key informants and ten community members who know the practice
of ‘kalon’ .
The data were gathered through a personal interview which was conducted from
January 2012 to February 2012.
Ibaloi’s as one tribe in Benguet has many customs, beliefs and traditional practices
which includes which is a way of courtship and marriage.
Kalon in Tublay has three-first approaches, first is through the man’s initiation
wherein the man is the one who chooses the woman he likes, second is the elder’s choice
wherein when the elders notices some olden men and women in the community they
encourage them to marry through ‘kalon’ and the third one is through parents betrothal
wherein the parents agree to inter-marry their siblings. The first two ways have the same
processes during the tulag and the wedding proper. In case of the parent’s betrothal the
parents will be the one to inform their siblings about the visitation in the woman’s house
and during the tulag and wedding proper it follows the same processes in the first tw ways
stated above.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Kalon, just like many other cultural practices, has also changes. Today, the type of
drink used by the ‘mengalon’ is changed by any liquor usually 4x4 instead of rice wine
‘tapey’. The proposal can be null and void unlike before that if the woman dislikes the man,
she is forced. Also there were changes of who officiates the marriage rites who are
authorized to conduct the marriage rites (judge/ mayor, priest/ pastor and the like), and
couples are required to get a marriage certification at the municipal office unlike before
that marriage through elders is enough proof that couples are legally married. The form of
‘bilin’ has also changed, instead of in the form of ‘bah’diw’; it can be only through a simple
speech during the wedding program. In the finance of the wedding, the ‘mengalon’ are no
longer the financer instead the couple themselves.
The roles of elders in the processes of ‘kalon’ includes: being an intermediary
(‘mengalon’/convincer), para-piltek ni adak and adviser (mamilin).
Moreover, 11 of the respondents said that ‘kalon’ is advantageous and nine said
that it is disadvantageous. Based on the results it is advantageous because a shy man is
privileged to marry the woman he likes without direct courtship, both parties know each
other’s family background, olden men ‘baaks’ can get married through , guidance and
advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples are rest assured, rich families are betrothed to a
both rich.
Meanwhile, the sated reasons for its disadvantageous is that, women are
sometimes forced, love between the couple is not readily established, and that the process
of force marriage is the cause of misunderstandings between the couples.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Conclusions
The following conclusions were drawn based on the findings of the study:
1.
How ‘kalon’ is practiced in Tublay is similar with how ‘kalon’ is practiced in other
‘Ibaloi’ communities in Benguet however, differences like a large male carabao is
butchered for the wedding feast is not necessary in Tublay.
2.
The indigenous ways of marriage practice in Tublay, Benguet have changed due to
different factors brought about by different belief systems of the community members,
effect of modernization and education.
3.
There are varied lessons that can be learned from the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay,
Benguet.
4.
There is still a high regard on elders in any cultural practices in indigenous
communities and they are considered as source of wisdom and adviser of certain practice.
5. Like in any cultural practices, ‘kalon’ has also its own advantages and disadvantages.
Recommendations
1.
The practice of ‘kalon’ maybe maintained though not all the processes maybe
applied. As stated by some key informants and respondents, there are still those man or
‘baaks’ who are waiting for the approach and help of ‘mengalon’.
2.
High regards to elders in indigenous communities should still be maintained
however, how one must follow maybe taken into its proper context and application.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
3.
Cultural practices like ‘kalon’ should not be looked at as a ‘paganistic’ way of doing
things but should be looked at as a way of creating a harmonious relationship between a
man and woman and/or among members of the community if done and observed properly
and appropriately.
4.
Further study about the impact of ‘kalon’ on women in Ibaloi communities and the
general acceptance of such practice in the community may be conducted in other
Ibaloi communities where ‘kalon’ is still actively practiced.
5.
Further study on cultural practices of Tublay is recommended.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
LITERATURE CITED
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AWAS, F. 2009. Staged Bendian as a Medium of Community Dialogue and Action for
Development and Cultural Integrity in Contemporary Kabayan, Benguet,
Philippines. P. 1
CELINO, S.M. 1983. The Ritual of the Ibalois of daklan. MS Thesis. University of Baguio.
Baguio City. Pp. 50-51.
EVANS, A. 1997. Elders Roundtable- A cross Cultural Perspective. Retrieved November
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FIALEN, J. 2011. Ibaloi Traditions on Courtship and Marriage Vanishing? Retrieved
December 6, 2012 from http:/www.nordisweekly.com
LEWIS J. 2008 Preserving our Culture.fl.The Role of Elders in the Cultural Resilience.
Retrieved November 19, 2012 from http:/elders.uaa.alaska.edu/powerpoint/elder
resilience_lewis.pdf.
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http:/www.benguet.gov.com.
NGODCHO, J.M. 2004. The Bontoc Tribe: Its Indigenous Culture and Cultural Changes
and their Social Implications. Tangawan Research Journal Retrieved November 14, 2012
from http:/www.carian.wikispaces.com/indigenous+culture+Bontok+
Mt.+Pro.
RIVERA, E.G. 1988-1989. The Rituals of the Ibaloys: Their Implication to Education. MS
Thesis. Baguio Central University. Baguio City. Pp. 47-48.
SAMOVAR, L.A. 2010. Communication between Cultures 7thedition. P.7
SAMOVAR & PORTER. 1994. Intercultural Communication A Reader 7thedition. P.7
SCOTT, W.H. 1996. An Igorot Migrants Perspective- ICBE Home Page. Retrieved
November
14,
2012 from
http:/www.icbe.eu/Documents/Igorot_European_Consultation_Vienna.pdf.
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SMARTSCHOOLS. 2012. Afo ni Ibaloi Rituals, Dances, and Musical Instruments.
Retrieved
March 5, 2011 from http:/www.mysmartschools.ph/web/Our
Heritage Our Identity/ibalois.
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Retrieved
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http:/www.un.org/esa/socdev/unpfii/documents/SOWIP_chapter2.pdf.
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Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013. Learning from the Past: Processes of
Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage in Tublay, Benguet. Benguet State
University, La Trinidad, Benguet.
Adviser: Filmore Y. Awas, MDevCom
ABSTRACT
This study aimed to determine the socio- demographic profile of the respondents,
document the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’, and determine the changes of
‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet, and the roles of elders in the process of ‘kalon’. Likewise, the
study aimed to determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay. As part
of the study the researcher produced a simple video documentary of the practice.
The data were obtained through personal interview with the key informants and
respondents using guide questions.
The results showed that though some of the respondents did not finish their
education, it did not affect their credibility of giving information about ‘kalon’ as their
years of stay in the area and their exposure to the said practice is what is more considered
in the study.
The processes in the practice of ‘kalon’ involved three-first different approaches as
follows: man’s choice, elders’ choice, and through parent’s betrothal. The entire threefirst
ways followed some of each other’s processes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Meanwhile, there were changes applied in the practice, during the ‘kalon’. The
changes were noted as: mambunongs/elders no longer officiate the marriage rites instead
it is now solemnized by a priest, judge or mayor; the couples are required to get a
certification of marriage from the municipal registrar’s office and if they got married in
church the couples should also have a church orientation/confirmation. Also, the kalon
proposal can be freely aborted. Further, ‘bilin’ is integrated at the wedding program; the
wedding expenses are financed by the couples and the liquor used by the ‘mengalon’ was
4x4 in replacement of ‘tapey’.
The roles of elders in the practice of ‘kalon’ were as: intermediary; ‘para-piltek ni
adak’ and ‘mamilin’ (adviser).
Majority of the respondents perceived that ‘kalon’ was advantageous because a shy
man was privileged to marry the woman she wants without direct courtship; both parties
know each other’s family track and that the couples know each other’s family background
; “Baaks” aged 35 to 45 or older can still get marry by the help of the ‘mengalon’; guidance
and advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples was always assured because the elders were
held responsible in the couples courtship and marriage; before, there were many successful
marriage through ‘kalon’ because the couples are afraid to separate in respect of their
‘mengalon’ or elders; rich families were betrothed to a rich family also.
Meanwhile, the reasons why the respondents perceived it as disadvantageous was
woman are at times forced to marry the man she does not love or like to be with and in
worst cases, in parents betrothal, both the man and woman were forced to get marry; love
between the couple was not readily established before marriage, although in most cases, it
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
developed through the years; and sometimes the process of betrothed marriage was the
cause of misunderstandings between the couple.
The researcher recommendeds that the practice of ‘kalon’ maybe maintained
though not all the processes maybe applied. As stated by some key informants and
respondents, there are still those man or ‘baaks’ who are waiting for the approach and help
of ‘mengalon’; high regards to elders in indigenous communities should still be maintained
however, how one must follow maybe taken into its proper context and application. Also,
cultural practices like ‘kalon’ should not be looked at as a ‘paganisitic’ way of doing things
but should be looked at as a way of creating a harmonious relationship between a man and
woman and/or among members of the community if done and observed properly and
appropriately. Moreover, study about the impact of ‘kalon’ on women in Ibaloi
communities and the general acceptance of such practice in the community may be
conducted in other Ibaloi communities where ‘kalon’ is still actively practiced and further
study on cultural practices of Tublay is recommended.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
INTRODUCTION
Rationale
Culture is an integral way and means of life. How it is being practiced and used in
different situations and how it affects one’s life have already become the center of study in
different fields of communication.
Culture, as cited by Samovar (2010), is a set of human objective and subjective
elements that in the past have increased the probability of survival and resulted in
satisfaction for the participants in an ecological niche, and thus become shared among those
who could communicate with each other because they had a common language and they
live in the same time and place.
The same source further explained that “although culture is not the only stimulus
behind behaviour, its omnipresent quality makes it one of the most powerful”. What makes
culture so unique is that you share your culture with other people who have been exposed
to similar experiences. In a sense, culture unites people with a frame of reference in a
society.
Philippines is one of the many countries with unique culture. The country consists
of 82 provinces with numerous cultural practices. Its richness in culture makes it highly
different and more prominent from other countries.
As noted by Abada (2007), Philippines have diverse customs, cultural heritage, arts,
traditions and spoken languages. One of the many practices that many Filipino families
still uphold up to this day is courtship. Usually, this is performed by the male (who is the
suitor) visiting the home of the female. Cordilerra is one of the regions of the Philippines
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
with notable engagement and marriage practices. In Benguet alone, several practices can
be noted depending on their ethno-linguistic group. There are two major ethno-linguistic
groups in Benguet: the Ibaloi and Kankanaey. Ibaloi occupies the southeast part of the
province and speak Nabaloy, with a linguistic sound nearer to Pangasinense. The Ibaloi
groups practice a traditional way of courtship and marriage called as ‘kalon’
Kalon is a practice whereby a man chooses a woman to marry without direct
courtship. According to the data of the National Commission on Indigenous People’s
(NCIP)-Benguet, ‘kalon’ started in 1950’s as a form of courtship and marriage of the
people in Benguet, partly the Ibaloi and Kankanaey. For some kankana-eys, they call it
‘kaon’.
Kalon occurs when a young man is interested in a girl, then he will ask an older
person ‘mengalon’ to visit the girl and ask her if she wants to marry the young man. If the
girl agrees, the wedding will immediately follow.
In an article published in Northern Dispatch by Fialen (2011) ‘kalon’ is being
practiced before to retain wealth of both families. One of the reasons of its practice, as cited
in the National Commission on Indigenous People’s (NCIP) Benguet (2012), is that the
parents want to remain family ties within two families.
Tublay is among few Ibaloi communities who rarely practice ‘kalon’. There are
what they call (old men) ‘baaks’ who are being encouraged by elders in the community to
get marry through ‘kalon’.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Given the importance of documenting processes in relation to one’s cultural
practice, this study is initiated. Documenting such while it is still being practiced is also
important as it may give insights to communication students as to how communication is
used in different context of culture.
Further, it is somehow important to see the changes that occurred in the practice
through time and how it is perceived by the present generation.
The study also highlights the role of elders in a community particularly in ‘kalon’ as a
mediator or communicator between two parties involved.
The study may also provide important insight for community reflection whether or
not to sustain such practice. In communication aspect, a reflexive evaluation is important
for a cultural practice that is seen to be pragmatic.
Statement of the Problem
The study sought to answer the following questions:
1. What are the socio-demographic profiles of the respondents?
2. What are the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay?
3. What are the changes in the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay?
4. What are the roles of elders in the practice of ‘kalon’?
5. How is ‘kalon’ perceived by the community of Tublay nowadays?
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Objectives of the Study
Generally, the study aimed to document the processes and rituals done during
‘kalon’.
Specifically the study aimed to:
1. determine the socio-demographic profile of the respondents;
2. document the processes involved in the practice of ‘kalon’;
3. determine the changes in ‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet;
4. determine the roles of the elders in the processes of ‘kalon’; and,
5. determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay.
Importance of the Study
The main purpose of the study is to document ‘kalon’ as a way of courtship and
marriage in Tublay, Benguet; to identify the processes being applied in the practice; the
changes done in the practice; and to identify how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community.
As a part of documentation, this study aimed to provide an audio-visual
documentation of the processes being performed in the . In this regard, the documentation
could be used by concerned organizations like National Center for Culture and Arts
(NCCA), NCIP and other policy makers as a point of reference. The documentation may
also serve as insight on some of the Ibaloi’s traditional way of marriage.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Scope and Limitations of the Study
The study focused only on the documentation of the processes involved in the
practice of ‘kalon’ nowadays, the changes occurred in the practice, the role of elders in the
practice of ‘kalon’ and how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the community of Tublay,
Benguet.
The study also presented five cases of ‘kalon’ that already happened.
A simple video documentary of the practice was produced as a part of the study.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
REVIEW OF LITERATURE
The Ibaloi’s
The respondents of the study are ‘Ibaloi’s’. They are one among the six major
ethno-liguistic groups in the Cordilerra Administrative Region (CAR) which is located in
the Northern Central Philippines. The others are Ifugao, Kankana-ey, Tingguan, Kalinga,
and Itneg. While the ‘Ibalois’ call themselves ‘Ibadoy’, they may also call themselves
‘Igodot’ which is the ‘Ibaloi’ pronunciation of ‘Igorot’. According to Dr. Trinidad Pardo
de Tavera, the word ‘Igorot’ is composed of the old Tagalog root word ‘golot’ meaning
mountain chain and the prefix “I” meaning “people of” or “dweller in” (Scott;1996). The
‘Ibalois’ are indigenous in the southern part of Benguet province where where Baguio City
is geographically located SmartSchools (2012).
According to the NCIP data posted on the official website of Benguet province
(2012), ‘Ibalois’ are also known as ‘Ipaway’ which means people living in valleys, plateaus
or somewhat sloping areas not covered with dense vegetation. For them, the term ‘paway’
means a place devoid of heavy vegetation.
This tribal group dominates the province of Benguet. Hence, when meeting lowland
people of other tribal groups, the ‘Ibalois’ would say, “We are Benguet people.”
Historically, They are the native inhabitants of the province.
The main occupation of the ‘Ibalois’ are farming and gardening. A very
hardworking people, they have succeeded in making La Trinidad, Benguet as the salad
bowl of the Philippines due to their abundant vegetable products like Baguio beans,
cabbage and Irish potatoes as well as strawberries NCIP (2012).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Kalon and its Processes
Kalon is the traditional way of courtship and marriage among the ‘Ibalois’; however
its processes as to how it is practiced differs from one place to another. When a young man
is interested in a girl, he will ask an older person to visit the girl and ask her if she wants
to marry the young man. If the girl agrees, the wedding will immediately follow NCIP
(2012).
In some places, the man sends a ‘mangadon’ to propose marriage to the woman
whose parents are notified of the marriage proposal. If the parents favour the man, they
help their children in convincing into accepting the marriage offer. So, with the prodding
of her parents and the gullible tongue of the ‘mangadon’, the offer of marriage may be
accepted Celino (1983).
This has been practiced by the ‘Ibalois’ since the early 50’s until the early 80’s. The
Ibaloi man need not to court a woman, instead the former chooses a woman he wants for a
wife and expresses his love through an intermediary with a good reputation in the
community and through parental agreement Fialen, (2011).
According to Lakay Bugawi as cited by Fialen (2011), almost all Ibaloi
communities practice ‘kalon’ which he thinks is good for the man because he can choose
the woman he likes without direct courtship. A respected individual intercedes in his behalf
including his parents who have to talk with the woman’s parents.
Celino (1983) narrated that the third party or intermediary talks about the man’s
good qualities so the woman gets to know the man who wants to marry her. One way to
determine if the woman likes the man is she agrees to drink the ‘tapey’ (rice wine) offered
by the intermediary. If she refuses, the proposal is aborted. Lakay Bugawi also revealed
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
that because of this practice, Ibaloi men have become dependent on other persons or on
their parents to court the woman they love. To begin with, many Ibaloi men are shy to court
and express their feelings of love. Eshakel paylaeng e ibadoi ja egto amtan mangashem,
ambaeng ton ekwan e ayat to isunga talaga emun shy kami mango Lakay Bugawi added.
According to him, one of the reasons for this practice before was for the rich clans
and families to keep their wealth within their class. Thus this agreement happens despite
the children wishes or decisions. Baknang koma ket para soni baknang ngo Fialen (2011).
Based on the study of Rivera (1988), the ‘kalon’ is generally done immediately
after the parents or when both partners of marriage reach their right age and have agreed
to the marriage. Normally an animal is butchered; usually a chicken or any animal cared
for.
As cited in the study of Rivera (1988), before the marriage ritual takes place in the
house of the man or the woman. A large male carabao is butchered for the wedding feast.
In the evening, one mail pig is slaughtered to coincide with the entrance of the bride and
groom into the house escorted by an elderly couple. At the door, the ‘mambunong’ blesses
them by pouring water over their knees and toes; prays for the couple’s life to be a long
one, full of bliss and prosperity.
After this, each occupies designated corners of the house the whole night, where
they listen to ‘bah’diw’ songs and advice of elderly people. The following day, another
male pig is killed and prepared as in a ‘kappi’ ritual. Early this day, the newlyweds wash
themselves in a spring of water as they embark for a new status in life. The groom takes a
bath in the upper portion of the river, while the bride washes herself in the lower portion.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
The practice of having the man occupy the upper portion of recognizes the husband as the
head of the family with the wife subordinating herself in matters affecting the family.
This completes the marriage ritual making the newly-weds husband and wife Rivera
(1988).
According to the dissertation of Celino (1983), the wedding takes eight days. The
eating and dancing may continue up to the eight day.
Changing Cultural Practices
Necessarily, some if not all practices have changed over the years. Our forefathers
have accepted the necessity of change even themselves making many adjustments to the
changing conditions of their own time. We can only empathize with the momentous
decisions needed by our forefathers as they decided to migrate to the place they have
imparted unto us as a domain NCIP (2012).
The culture of our forefathers also evolved, changed by the conditions of the
domain like the topography, the resources, the unseen forces and spirits in present-day
NCIP (2012).
One example is the courtship and marriage tradition of Bontoc, Mt. Province.
Traditional courtship was done in the ‘ulug’ and marriage was officiated by old men and
women at the bride’s residence then repeated at the bridegroom’s residence. Some
marriages were arranged by parents or relatives Ngodcho (2004).
Young maidens slept in the ‘ulug’ at night while their days were spent doing homes
chores or working in the fields or ‘kaingins’. The young men of the village visited them in
the ‘ulug’. The young men and women related stories sang and had fun together. A young
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
man who fell in love with a young lady may sleep with her in the ‘ulug’, with the presence
of the other young ladies. The young men and women were very much disciplined; hence,
no premarital relations existed. Discipline was one of the values learned in the ‘ulug’ on
the part of the ladies and in the ‘ato’ on the part of the gentlemen.
If the lady reciprocated the love of the man, then the two would tell their parents
Ngodcho (2004).
Ngodcho (2004) added that when they were about to be married, the marriage
ceremony was done at the bride’s residence. There, a pig was butchered. Old men and
women, some of the bride’s and bridegroom’s friends, and the family ate together.
Meanwhile, ‘kapya’ (prayer) for the good health and wealth of the newlywed couple was
recited by an old man or woman. The ‘kapya’ was offered to Kafunian/ Lumawig. In the
‘kapya’, the spirits of the dead relatives were also invited to dine with the family. That day,
a basket of cooked rice and meat was brought to the house of the bridegroom. If the parents
of the groom accepted the offer, it meant the bride was accepted by the groom’s family;
otherwise, no marriage would take place. With the acceptance of the offer by the groom’s
family, the same ceremonies would be done at the groom’s residence the following day.
During those days, the bride and the bridegroom should not wash their hands and should
not take a bath so that good luck would remain with them. Sexual intercourse during
those days was also a taboo (Ngodcho, 2004).
The said marriage practice was called “ensukat nan lokmog” which literally meant
“Exchanged of cooked sweet potatoes”.
Among the families, parental engagement was very common. Parents matched
their children when these children were still young. The rich married the rich so as to retain
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
their wealth which was in terms of rice fields, mountains, animals like carabaos and cows,
jars, glass beads and other precious materials Ngodcho (2004).
Today, courtship is no longer done in the ‘ulug’. ‘Ulugs’ disappeared in the middle
of the 1960’s. Courtship is done in the homes.
According to Ngodcho (2004) the disappearance of the ‘ulug’ is attributed to formal
education and Christianity, and also structure of the present houses. The Bontoc houses
nowadays are much bigger and can accommodate all members of the family. Most boys
and girls are going to school. They study and sleep in their homes.
The study added that native marriage ceremony is still being practiced but minus
the taboos like those on taking a bath and on sexual intercourse. In addition to the native
marriage ceremony, marriage is officiated by a judge or mayor and in church by a priest.
Marriage has therefore become a cultural, legal and religious rite.
Our knowledge systems and practices are often linked with our belief systems, and
are inseparable from each other. With the changes in belief systems like the adoption of
the Christian faith, some of the processes and systems would no longer be practiced NCIP
(2012).
NCIP (2012) further explained that even the other introduced knowledge systems
and practices from western influence have become part of our indigenous systems, as we
adopted them, it changed the very system of our culture they are now part of it NCIP
(2012).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Advantages of Cultural Practices
Most of the activities of daily life are accompanied by rituals and cultural practices
aimed at maintaining that relationship with, for example, the ancestors or nature. Cultural
practices relating to ancestors are particularly important because of the reciprocity existing
between living and deceased persons. The community depends on the goodwill and help
of ancestors through dreams and spiritual paths, and the ancestors need to be honoured
through appropriate ceremonies and maintenance of their burial places. Other cultural
practices relate to nature and intend to maintain the relationship with the other forces in
nature on which their success as farmers, hunters or pastoralists will depend United Nations
Educational Scientific and Cultural Organization-UNESCO, (2012).
For the development to be socially and economically sustainable, culture is also
taken into account but as civil organizations say it must be drawn upon the values, traditions
and cultures of the people in the countries and societies it serves.
Indigenous people’s cultures are self-sustaining and can guarantee indigenous people as a
sense of well-being UNESCO (2012).
Disadvantages of Some Cultural Practices
Constraints arising from cultural traditions often limit young people’s access to the
information and services they need to make informed and responsible decisions about their
sexual and reproductive lives World Health Organization (1996).
Some cultural traditions and expectations in some places can put disproportionate
constraints on girls and challenge the “physical and psychological health and integrity of
individuals. This is most evident in the practices of 1) marrying female children and very
young women and 2) female genital cutting (FGC), World Health Organization (1996).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Roles of Elders in Cultural Practices
Preserving our culture is the role of elders in the cultural resilience of native
communities Lewis (2008).
Native elders serve as teacher, mentor, family member, wisdom bearer, traditional
healer, and a role model in a community. They preserve language through teachings, teach
culture and traditions to youth, participate in tribal council, and preserve traditional way of
governing community (i.e tribal council, talking circles) Lewis (2008).
Traditionally, elders in northern Labrador held positions of influence in their
communities. As protectors of the community, they had the power to take an abused child
out of their home and they could ask people who disturbed the peace to leave the
community. These rights, however, were exercised in communities without established
authorities Evans (1997).
Definition of Terms
Ibaloi or Ibadoy. People of Benguet speaking Nabadoy, language close to
Pangasisnense.
Kalon. Is the traditional way of marriage which started on 1950’s. In English it
means to betroth.
Mengadon or ‘mengalon’. One who acts as a go-between a man and a woman
during a . One who does courtship in favour of the man. Usually an elder from the
community. Baaks. Olden men
Tafey. Rice wine offered by the ‘mengalon’ to the lady during a ‘kalon’ . Sign of
agreement to the proposal if she drinks.
Tulag. The final process of ‘kalon’. The man’s group will visit the woman.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
METHODOLOGY
Locale and Time of the Study
The study was conducted in Tublay, Benguet. Tublay is a 5th class municipality in
the province of Benguet. It is located 263 km north of Manila and 13 km north of Baguio
City. It has a land area of 57.3 km2, representing 2.2 % of the land area of Benguet. The
topography is generally mountainous with an elevation of 1400 meters above sea level. It
has two pronounced seasons-the dry and the wet seasons with a temperature coldest at 6.5
C and warmest at 27.5 C.
The municipality of Tublay have existing tourism resources specifically located in
the barangays of Ambongdolan, and Tuel. Some of the tourist spots are the Bengaongao
and Paterno cave located in Ambongdolan, Buasen Training Center and Winnaca Village
in Acop and Asin Hot spring in Tuel. There are also potential tourism resources for
development, which can be located in all the other barangays.
However, in the barangays where the tourist spots are found, tourists are housed
either by the residents themselves or in the rural health clinics or school buildings in the
area but this is through proper coordination with the barangay chairperson or barangay
officials, rural health midwife in the area and the Department of Education personnel.
The culture of the community is the same with other indigenous peoples whose lives and
traditions is a land-based culture.
Tublay was chosen as the locale of the study because it was observed that ‘kalon’ is still
being practiced there.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Tublay is politically subdivided into 8 barangays namely Barangay Basil, Ba-ayan, Tublay
Central, Daclan, Caponga, Ambassador, Tuel and Ambongdolan.
Figure 1. Map of the municipality of Tublay, showing the locale of study
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Respondents of the Study
The respondents of the study were divided into two groups: the five elders and
another five who experienced ‘kalon’who served as the key informants, ten community
members from Tublay who have the knowledge on the practice. They were chosen
purposively by the researcher. The criteria for choosing the key informants were as follows:
must be in the age of elder; must have the knowledge on the rituals and processes of ; must
have experience serving as mediator in . The criteria for choosing the respondents were as
follows: must be born Ibaloy (male or female); live within the barangay for not less than
25 years and must have knowledge on the rituals and processes of ‘kalon’.
Also, the researcher interviewed five persons who got married through .
Data Collection
The researcher gathered the data on the processes of ‘kalon’ through personal
observation. Aside from personal observation, the key informants and respondents were
interviewed personally with guide questions. The questions were translated to Ibaloi dialect
during the interview in order to aid understanding between the researcher and the
respondents.
Data Gathered
The data gathered focused on the socio-demographic profile of the respondents,
specifically their name, gender, age, occupation, address, religion and their educational
attainment, the processes in the practice of , changes in the practice in Tublay, Benguet,
roles of elders in the practice and how is perceived by the community. Also, the data
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
include five stories of ‘kalon’ which were retold by the interviewees who got married
through such practice.
Data Analysis
The data gathered were consolidated, tabulated and analyzed using descriptive
analysis and were presented in a narrative form.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
RESULTS AND DISCUSSION
This section presents the analysis and discussion of the data based on the objectives
of the study. It covers the socio-demographic profile of the respondents; processes involved
in the practice of ‘kalon’; changes in the practice of ‘kalon’, roles of elders in the practice
of ‘kalon’ and how is ‘kalon’ perceived by the community of
Tublay nowadays.
Socio-demographic Profile of the Respondents
There were twenty respondents of the study. Five of the twenty respondents were
elders who served as the key informants; five of them were those who experienced ‘kalon’.
The first five elders were chosen, as they were the ones recommended by the community
to be knowledgeable about the said practice for long. The researcher interviewed them
personally. The other ten respondents were community members who knew the practice of
‘kalon’.
Table 1 shows the socio-demographic profile of the key informants.
Key Informants. Table 1 shows the socio-demographic profile of the key
informants. As shown in the table, six were male and four were female who belonged to
age bracket 45 to 85. With regards to their educational attainment, one was able to graduate
college, four were able to graduate high school and the rest were either high
school/elementary undergraduate, elementary graduate, or did not enter formal education
at all. All of the key informants stayed in the community for more than 45 years from the
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
time of the study. Their educational backgrounds however do not affect their credibility
Table 1. Socio-demographic profile of the key informants
NAME SEX
AGE
ADDRESS
YEARS EDUCATIONAL OCCUPA-
(IN
OF
ATTAINMENT TION
TUBLAY)
STAY
Apili Albis
Male
83
Daclan,
83
Elementary
Farmer
Graduate
Kero Tibong
Male
76
Central
76
Elementary
Mangilot
Undergraduate
Gabriel Toribio
Male
52
Tuel
52
High School
Barangay
Graduate
Captain
Narcisa Buslay
Female 73
Daclan
73
High School
Baby Sitter
Graduate
Lideng Tomino
Female 80
Daclan
80
No Formal
Farmer
Education
Bernardo Sin-ot
Male
60
Daclan
60
Elementary
Farmer
Graduate
Lydia Albis
Female 64
Daclan
64
High School
Farmer
Graduate
Victor Dalgis
Male
49
Daclan
49
Vocational
Laborer
Graduate
Lourdes Dalgis
Female 48
Daclan
48
College
Farmer
Graduate
Mason Albis
Male
57
Daclan
57
High School
Farmer
Undergraduate
of giving information about ‘kalon’ as their years of stay in the area and their exposure to
the said practice is what is more considered in the study.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Furthere, the eight key informats belonged to Barangay Daclan while the other belonged
to Barangay Tuel and Central. Seven of the key informants stayed in the community for 45
to 75 years while the rest stayed for 76 to 85 years.
The key informants have occupations from Barangay Captain (1), farmer (6), baby
Sitter (1), laborer (1) and ‘mangilot’ (1). The elder key informants used to do ‘kalon’ when
they see olden men and women at around ages of 40-45 who were not yet married thus they
suggest to them to marry through the said practice. This is the usual way of ‘kalon’ done
in Tublay nowadays.
Community Respondents. Table 2 shows the socio-demographic profile of the
community respondents. Of the ten respondents, seven were female and three were male.
Five of them belonged to the age bracket of 25 to 40 while the other five belonged to the
age bracket of 41 to 65.
All of the respondents stayed for more than 25 years in different barangays of
Tublay, Benguet. With regards to their educational attainment majority (6) of them were
college graduates. The respondents were working either as farmers (3) laborer (2) teacher
(2) government employee (2) and plain housewife (1).
Table 2. Socio-demographic profile of the respondents (Community Members)
NAME
SEX
AGE ADRESS
YEARS EDUCATIONAL
OCCUPATION
(IN
OF
ATTAINMENT
TUBLAY)
STAY
Maurita Kinispil Female 54
Tili,
54
Elementary
Housewife
Daclan
Undergraduate
Loida Buslay
Female 32
Bangho
32
College
Teacher
graduate
Margarita Copete Female 31
Namudan
31
College
Farmer
graduate
Catalino Olida
Female 61
Tili,
61
Elementary
Farmer
Daclan
graduate
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Juan Esnara
Male
47
Posos,
47
College
Government
Central
graduate
employee
Agustina Anton Female 30
Bangho,
30
College
Teacher
Daclan
graduate
Abraham
Male
48
Caponga
48
College
Government
Lacaden
graduate
employee
Raquel Gabriel Female 33
Asin, Tuel
33
College
Laborer
graduate
Sheryl Sabado Female 25
Balangabang 25
High School Laborer
Tuel
Graduate
Mercedes
Female 55
Sayatan,
55
Elementary
Farmer
Alidong
Daclan
graduate
Processes Involved in the Practice of ‘Kalon’
There were three-first approaches of how ‘kalon’ is being practiced in Tublay,
Benguet according to the respondents as follows: man’s choice, elders’ choice, and
through parent’s betrothal. The processes in these approaches, according to the key
informants, may differ from one Ibaloi community to another. For easy discussion,
processes before, during and after the marriage were considered. These were all based on
the stories of the elders and the key informants who had experienced ‘kalon’ in the
community. Tables were presented for easy reading on the processes of ‘kalon’ so that the
readers who do not have ample time to read may just refer to the table. It will aid too much
time in reading. Also, figures were presented for easy visualization of the processes.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Before the ‘Kalon’
Discussions here follow the three approaches of how ‘kalon’ is practiced before
the Tulag and marriage as narrated by the key informants.
Man’s choice. This approach is usually done if the man is brave enough to say what
he feels towards a certain woman and decides to seek assistance of a ‘mengalon’ (an elder
man or woman but usually man) to get the approval of that woman. The processes in this
approach is shown in Table 3.
On the other hand, Figure 2 also shows the re-enacted communication between the
‘mengalon’ and the man. In the figure, the man informed the ‘mengalon’ about the woman
he wanted or interested with. He would say “piyan ko si (name of the woman) et nu
mibidin kuma atngi mowak ga, itavtaval mowak nu sanno piyan to. (I am interested with
this woman. Can you help me court her?). After this, the ‘mengalon’ would form a group
of elders to help him convince the girl.
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Table 3. The processes done before the ‘kalon’ (Man’s Choice)
SOURCE
MESSAGE
CHANNELS
RECEI-
FEEDBACK
USED/
VER
MEDIUM OF
TRANSMISSI
ON
Man (Will
Piyan ko si (name of the
Verbal
Mengalon
If the ‘mengalon’ is
inform the
woman) et nu mibidin kuma
willing to help the
‘mengalon’
atngi mowak ga, itavtaval
man, he/she will
about the
mowak nu sanno piyan to.
form a group or call
woman he is (I am interested with this
for a group of elders
interested
woman. Can you help me
to help him
with)
court her?).
convince the woman
If the parents and
Man (Will
Tayo kedunen si (Name of
Verbal
Man’s
concerned relatives
inform his
the woman) nu haman ja
Parent
agree with the date
parents
akew” (We will visit the
of visitation, the
about the
woman on this day).
man informs the
date of
‘mengalon’ about
visitation to
the date of
the
visitation.
woman’s
house)
Verbal
If the woman’s
Mengalon
Endaw kami di nu haman ja
Woman’s
parent wants her
daughter to be
(Will inform akew, mi di bisitaen hata
Parent
betrothed, he will
the
balasang jo (We will come
agree to the offer of
woman’s
and visit your lassy on this
the ‘mengalon’
parent about day
their
visitation
Figure 2. The man communicates with the ‘menga lon’ about the woman he is interested
with (re-enactment).
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In some cases, the ‘mengalon’ may not call for a company (other elders) to
convince the woman if he/ she think he/she can do the convincing.
On the other side, the man will inform his parents about the date of visitation to the
woman’s house (Figure 3). The usual message relayed says, “tayo kedunen si (Name of
the woman) nu haman ja akew” (We will visit the woman on this day).
When the parents and concerned relatives agree with the date, the man informs the
‘mengalon’ about the date of visitation. The ‘mengalon’ then informs the date of visitation
to the woman’s parents for them to be ready.
This approach happened to Mason Albis-Adelyn and Albiso Albis-Lydia. Mason
and Adelyn had their ‘kalon’ on 1979. Mason’s elder relative was the one who served as
his ‘mengalon’.
Figure 3. The man talks with his parents about the date of the visitation to the woman’s
house(re-enactment).
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When they had their ‘kalon’, his parents accompanied Mason. According to
Mason, he personally talked to the ‘mengalon’ to accompany him and his family to visit
the girl. When both parties came to an agreement, the ‘mengalon’ opened the pair of
bottled wine for everybody to drink. The drinking of a wine symbolizes the agreement
between the man and the woman to be together as husband and wife.
In the case of Albiso Albis, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1970. According to Albiso,
as told by Lydia, Albiso saw him in a farm. When Albiso saw him, he got interested to
her and so he informed his parents that he wants Lydia. Albisos’ parents then called for a
‘mengalon’ who is their neighbor namely Jose Kinispil and Antonio Sin-ot. Being the first
child during their time, Albiso offered ‘noang’ as his offering of love to Lydia.
The offering (usually animals), according to the respondents, is not mandatory and
usually depends on the man courting.
Elders choice. This approach or option was usually done when elder/s in the community
notices/notice some ‘baaks’ (olden men and/or women who have not married yet) in the
community. Table 4 shows the processes in this approach.
In different occasions when an elder spotted these ‘baaks’, they encourage them
to marry through ‘kalon’. The elder/s usually asked: “piga la tawen mo, apay egka paylang
mengasawa? Piyan mun shaha ibeka/ikalon sun ________[Name of the woman]?” (How
old are you now, why are you not married yet? Do you want __________ [Name of the
woman] so that we will betroth her to you?). If the man agrees, the ‘mengalon’ then
advices the man to tell his parents about the visiting to the woman’s house.
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This applies not only for the ‘baaks’. In some cases, the elders still betroth if they
thought the man and woman were able to support their family in the future. In this case,
not only elders can push a man and woman to be together through ‘kalon’ but also those
Table 4. The processes done before the ‘kalon’ (through the elders choice)
Sender
Message
Channel
Receiver Feedback
Used/ of
Medium
Transmission
Elder
Piga la tawen mo, apay Verbal
Man
If the man agrees,
egka
paylang
the ‘mengalon’ then
mengasawa?
Piyan
advices the man to
tell his parents about
mun shaha
the visiting to the
ibeka/ikalon sun (Name
woman’s house.
of the woman)?” (How
old are you now, why
are you not married yet?
Do you want (Name of
the woman) so that we
will betroth her to
you?).
who were older than those being pushed to get married.
This approach happened to the three couples namely: Bernardo and Victoria Sinot,
Victor and Lourdes Dalgis, and Fabian and Virginia Alos.
For Victoria and Bernardo Sin-ot, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1980. These couple’s
‘kalon’ was a surprise, as narrated by Bernardo. Unknowingly, he was betrothed without
his notice. His older cousins, Tsino and Sebio, were the one who choose the girl for him.
Bernardo, as he recalled with a laugh, narrated his story this way:
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“Egkak amta ey in sha ak gayam ‘inkalon’. Pinsak mamashem ja wara eres manong Tsino
tan manong Sebio shi baley, masdaawak ni apay ira ka en ngengenge , kwan sha ey (mayat
waray mi di kinalon). Mayat ngengenge an sha. Et sikak ngon egkak amta ei sikak gayam
so sha inkalon nak mekengengenge. Shinemag ko nu sipa sota sha kinalon tan nu enmowen
sota bee, egsha inkwan, “basta” e insungbat sha tan (piyan met nunta bee). Idi palabas
showen akew, masdaawak ni apay kwan ira manong Tsino ey kami kuno mengda pafel mi
nin Victoria shi munisipyo. Nak mantemtemulang ma ah ta kibtotak ey haman shagus
inkwan sha, egkak amta insungbat ko ni nan nemnemnemak nin. Asan sha ma ikwan ey
sikam sota mi ngengenge e nunta nashem ja mi intulag sun Victoria. Tadta, shinemag sha
ak mwan, nu ituloy kon esewa-en si Victoria. Enmowenak mala ah ta naksheng metlang
jen naytultulag” (I never expected that I was betrothed. One afternoon, my older cousins,
Tsino and Sebio, visited me in our house. Suddenly, they were laughing and telling story
that they just (betrothed) someone. Their laugh was so loud and I was cheerily laughing
with them not knowing that I was the one whom they betrothed with a woman. I asked my
cousins who they betrothed and what the woman had said. They answered me “secret” with
regards to who the man is but the woman said “yes”. After two days, I was surprised why
Manong Tsino and Manong Sebio were saying that I and Victoria will go to the municipal
office. I wondered and was muted with what they have just said. I didn’t know how to
respond to what they were saying. After a while, they already said that I was the one they
were pertaining to when they went to our house. All of a sudden, they asked me if I would
pursue their tulagan (agreement) with Victoria. Since she said “yes” to my two cousins and
betrothal was done, I had nothing to do but to say “yes”, in return.)
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Now, this couple is happily married and an active member and leader in a certain
Church in Tublay.
In the case of Virginia and Fabian, who had their ‘kalon’ in 1985, the one who
served as their ‘mengalon’ was Virginia’s older cousin named Rogel. As narrated by
Virginia, Rogel asked her if she liked to be betrothed to Fabian and she answered back
“shamag jo nin sikato a nu piyan towak ngo” (you ask him first if he likes me, too). After
this, Rogel visited Fabian and asked him if he wanted me to be his wife. Fabian said “yes”
and so they visited Virginia together with his parents. As stated, Virginia accepted the
agreement by just being silent and drank the ‘tapey’ offered by the ‘mengalon’.
According to her, silence during those times meant “yes”, so goes the common saying,
“silence means yes”.
Meanwhile, for Victor and Lourdes, they had their ‘kalon’ in 1992. The one who
served as their ‘mengalon’ was Victor’s cousin named Marciana, who was also Lourdes’s
friend. According to Lourdes, there was no formal talk between her relatives and the man’s
relatives during their ‘kalon’. In their case, the ‘kalon’ was done when Lourdes visited her
friend, Marciana, in Baguio. As stated by Lourdes, while they were telling stories,
Marciana suddenly talked about his cousin, Victor, and asked her “ento piyan mo si Victor
oh? Asavam ga et (You like Victor, don’t you? I suggest you marry him). Lourdes
answered “piyan towak ngo ngata aya”. With this, Marciana already understood that
Lourdes was just okay to marry Victor if ever. After this, Marciana told Victor that she
already (tulag) betrothed him to Lourdes. She advised Victor to often visit Lourdes in their
house. Victor did this until she won the feelings of Lourdes.
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It took a long time when Victor and Lourdes formally got married since Lourdes
decided to work first before getting married. Victor’s sister, Aurora, who happened to be
Lourdes’s friend and classmate in college, was fun of teasing her brother to Lourdes the
reason why she also helped in convincing Lourdes to marry her brother. According to
Victor, there was a problem encountered after their ‘kalon’. When he informed his mother
that he will marry in Sayatan, her mother almost retreated saying that“eshahel too shi
Sayatan et baka egshu kayen pekanen era,” (there are a lot of people in Sayatan and you
may not be able to feed them all during your wedding). Victor was doubting and thinking
about what her mother told him so he had to decide whether or not to continue visiting
Lourdes. He approached Marciana, who acted as the ‘mengalon’ and she told him to help
in financing the wedding; thus, the problem was solved. The marriage was made in May
1992.
Parent’s betrothal. This approach is done when a parent who has a son/daughter
who is not yet married (bachelor) and will meet a parent who has also a bachelor, they
agree to inter-marry (kalon) their bachelor son/daughter. For some cases when a parent
wants a parent to be his/her in-law he/she will talk to that favored parent that they will
inter-marry their unmarried son/daughter.
The message usually says “Kumare/Kumpare waray anak mun eg paylaeng
engasava oh? Piyan mun man asava ga et ira nima anak kun balasang/baro? Pan aspol ta
ira nu man piniyanan ira (Friend, isn’t it that you have a bachelor son/daughter? Would
you want to inter-marry him/her to my daughter/son, so that they will meet if they would
like each other?)
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This approach could be done anywhere or accidentally, usually during occasions in
the community where parents met and had discussions and consensus or agreement.
According to the respondents, before, this way of ‘kalon’ was considered as “rich for rich”
marriage; however, such notion was already discarded this time. This finding was
supported by the statement of Lakay Bugawi as stated by Fialen (2011) that one of the
reasons for the practice before was for the rich clans and families to keep their wealth
within their class. Baknang koma ket para soni baknang ngo (The rich should also be for
rich).
When the parents come with an agreement, they will inform and convince their
son/daughter to marry each other. As stated by Apili Albis, one of the key informants, this
practice was done forcedly and even without the decision of the betrothed man and woman
before but such case is no longer done today. The finding of forcing a man and woman to
get marry by their parents coincides with the statement of Lakay Bugawi, as cited by Fialen
(2011), that the agreement happens regardless if their children do not agree with their
decisions.
During the ‘Tulag’ and Wedding Proper. This is the eventual stage in the process
of ‘kalon’. The entire three-first ways follow some of each other’s processes.
Man’s choice. Table 5 shows the processes in this approach. For ‘kalon’ under this
approach, the man, together with his parent/s, the ‘mengalon’ and interested relatives if
there are, visits the house of the woman. This is also shown in Figure 4. They bring with
them any liquor, usually 4x4 as material used by the ‘mengalon’. In the old practice, rice
wine was being used. The liquor is a symbol of the “YES” and agreement of the woman to
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the ‘kalon’ offer. The ‘mengalon’ will talk in behalf of the man. The message usually says,
“Kinaet mi dis (Name of the man) or dinmaw kami di ta mi ekedon si (Name of the man).
Inun-an toha et piyan toha kuno jan asava-en. Et ibag-an shaha nu piyan mo ngo sikato?”
(We visited because this guy is interested to you and she wants to marry you. Now we want
to ask you if you also want him).
Oftentimes, when the woman is seen hesitated to accept the offer, the ‘mengalon’
talks about the good qualities of the man.
In some cases, when the woman’s parents really want the man, they help the
‘mengalon’ in convincing their daughter. This set-up corroborates with the
statement of Celino (1983) that if the parents favors the man, they help their children in
convincing into accepting the marriage offer. Rare are the times that a woman dislikes the
‘kalon’ offer. According to Narcisa Buslay, one of the key informants, women before was
afraid to say “no” to the ‘kalon’ offer because some elders cursed if they would not obey
them.
Figure 4. The man, together with his mother and the ‘mengalon’ (real) visits the house of
the woman (re-enactment)
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One way to determine if the woman accepted the ‘kalon’ offer was when she
agreed to drink the liquor offered by the intermediary (Figure 5). If she refused, the
proposal is cancelled. This finding is supported by the statement of Celino (1983) that
one way to determine if the woman likes the man is when she agrees to drink the ‘tapey’
(rice wine) offered by the intermediary.
Figure 5. The woman drinks the liquor offered by the ‘mengalon’ (re-enactment)
The wine is prayed over by the ‘mengalon’ before giving it to the woman.
This process is called ‘piltek’. The ‘mengalon’ throw a little of the liquor and pray
for more blessings and better understanding of the betrothed individuals. Usually, the
‘mengalon’ says in translated version, “Hayay jan naikalon ja shuwa, safay kuma ta
takshelan sha e pansaksahey sha. Ishawat ko ngarud e mapteng tan edagsak ja biyag son
sikayo” (May this betrothed couple be true to their promises in this ‘kalon’. May they be
progressive and happy during your married life). After this, both parties talk and set date
again for the wedding plans. This is the end of the ‘tulag’ and it is expected that everything
is already agreed upon between both parties. Wedding proper followed next.
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Marriage rites took place either in churches officiated by a priest or pastor, in the
municipal office officiated by the mayor or judge, or could also be in the woman’s house.
When the marriage rites took place in church or in the municipal office, the reception
usually took place in the woman’s house. At present, during the wedding program, which
is done after lunch, Ibalois of Tublay still have the old process by which the ‘bilin’ or
‘pamagbaga’ in ilokano (words of advice) by the principal sponsors, elders or any
respected individuals in the community. In the old practice, they do it through ‘ba’diw’;
however, today, they only speak during the program. Some may also do it through a song.
The one who does the ‘bilin’ utter some words of advice to the couples. When the program
ends, the couples would enter the house and escorted by pair of their sponsors (Figure 6).
Usually as stated by Albis, one of the key informants the couples enters the house before
sunset. The wedding takes in two days.
Figure 6. The couples enter the house escorted by a pair of sponsors
The elder’s choice. ‘Tulag’ and wedding under this approach is similar with that
of the first approach. Its communication process is shown in Table 6.
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The man, with his parents (if they wished to go) and the ‘mengalon’ visits the
house of the woman to do the tulag/kalon. The ‘mengalon’ will talk in behalf of the man.
The message usually says “dinmaw kami ale ta kinaet mi dis (Name of the man) (we came
because we accompanied (Name of the man). “Kursunada toha kunun esavaen isunga
ibag-an shaha nu piyan mo ngo sikato” (She wants to marry you so we want to ask you
also if you want him too). For the olden men and women who were engaged, the
‘mengalon’ would say,
“entoy sikayo kayo met da mangkafahay/ mangkabakol ey entoy egjo paylaeng
pengasavaan, isunga di wara engekuwan ey pantulag shahayo et, sunga sikato iyay,
tinavtaval mi nin si (man) nu piyan toha et kwanto met ey wen. Sunga niman ibag-an
shaha ngo (woman) nu piyan mo si iyay (man), (why is it that you are getting old but still
not married,
that’s why when somebody told us that we will betroth you, this is it, the
reason why we are here; but first we ask (Name of the man) if he likes you
and he said yes. So we will ask you (Name of the woman) if you want him
too).
If the girl accepted the offer of the ‘mengalon’ or wanted the man, she would drink
the liquor offered by the ‘mengalon’.
Before the woman will drink, the ‘mengalon’ do first the ‘piltek’ wherein he
prays over and ask wishes for the couple. The ‘mengalon’ throw a little of the wine.
Similar prayer in the first approach is being uttered here. Wedding proper followed next
after the agreement.
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Like the first approach, the marriage rites took place either in churches officiated
by a priest or pastor, in the municipal office officiated by the mayor or judge or could also
be in the woman’s house. When the marriage rites took place in church or in the municipal
office the reception usually took place in the woman’s house. At present, ‘bilin’ by the
principal sponsors, elders or any respected individuals is being practiced in replace of
‘bah’diw’, which is rarely done, according to the respondents. Message may also be
delivered through a song. The one who does the ‘bilin’ utter some words of advice to the
couple. When the program ends, the couple would enter the house escorted by pair of their
sponsors. The wedding celebration usually lasted for two days.
These processes followed the same process in the man’s initiation. The only addition done
in this process was the talk of the elder when the engaged man and woman were older. The
message goes this way: “entoy sikayo kayo met da mangkafahay/ mangkabakol ey entoy
egjo paylaeng pengasavaan, isunga di wara engekuwan ey pantulag shahayo et, sunga
kato yay, tinavtaval mi nin si (Name of the man) nu piyan toha et kwanto met ey wen. Sunga
niman ibag-an shaha ngo (Name of the woman) nu piyan mo si iyay (why is it that you are
getting old but still not married, that’s why when somebody told us that we will betroth
you, this is it, the reason why we are here; but first we ask (Name of the man) if he likes
you and he said yes. So we will ask you (Name of the woman) if you want him too).
Parent’s initiative. When the man’s family was ready for the visitation in the woman’s
house, his parents would call for a ‘mengalon’ to help them ask the woman and convince
both the man and woman to marry. This process is shown in Table 7. The ‘mengalon’ used
his or her gullible tongue to convince the man and woman. The message usually says,
“nantulag e parents jo ja pan asava shahayo et sikak ibag-an shahayo ngo (man and
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
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woman) nu tungpalen jo ngo ira” (your parents agreed to inter-marry you and I as
‘mengalon’ would like to ask if you would follow your parents’ wishes. Usually, when the
man and woman stays in the same community, the ‘mengalon’ says “mayat et ita nantulag
day nanang wenno tatang jo et taga-shiyay kayo pay jen showa say am-amta yo et e sahey
tan sahey tan hata paykamangan jo metlang” (it’s even better that your parents did the
betrothal for you and that you stay in the same community so you already know each other
and each family background).
Sometimes, the ‘mengalon’ also adds “aven enges to sota eshom ja dapdapu alid
kumpurmin ili inas asava sha et egsha amta ey wara gayam day asava nunta enasava sha,
wenno sota eshom ket eg mankinkina- awatan ugadi sha, ira manbekbekal et mansina ma
sota eshom” (unlike the others that their husband or wife came from other places and they
don’t know that their husband/wife is already married or there are those Table 7. The
process done during ‘kalon’ (through the parent’s initiative)
Sender
Message
Channel
Receiver
Feedback
Used/Medium
of
Transmission)
Mengalon “Nantulag e parents jo Verbal
The
When the man and
ja pan asava shahayo et
betrothed
the woman was
sikak ibag-an shahayo
man and
convinced to the
ngo (man and woman)
woman
‘mengalons’
nu tungpalen jo ngo ira”
(your
persuading words,
parents agreed to inter-
the usual drinking
marry you and I as
of liquor followed
‘mengalon’ would like
by
the
to ask if you would
‘mengalon’s’
follow your parents’
prayer is done.
wishes.
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some that because they do not understand each other’s attitude, they always quarrel, they
lead to separation.)
When the man and the woman was convinced to the ‘mengalons’ persuading
words, the usual drinking of liquor is done followed by the ‘mengalon’s’ prayer. This is
the end of the ‘tulag’ and it is expected that everything was already agreed upon between
the both parties. After this, both parties talked and set date for the wedding. This process
also occurred in the two approaches explained above.
Same as the two approaches, the marriage rites took place either in churches
officiated by a priest/pastor, in the municipal office officiated by the mayor/judge or could
also be in the woman’s house (garden wedding). Same process follows and usually
lasted for two days, too.
After the Kalon. Regardless of what approach was used, the couples were advised
to stay at home for three days to one week after marriage. They were not allowed to work
in the farm. This is what the elders call ‘ngilin’. According to Apili Albis, one of the key
informants, the couples are advised to do the ‘ngilin’ so that they will not see any wrong
or negative implications in marriage like snakes or chickens that are fighting. Albis said
that as the elders believe, these negative implications if seen may cause threat to the
marriage of the couples. The couples often than not obey this custom with a belief that
they will have progressive and fortunate life.
All the processes stated in the examples, are still the same process being practiced
today. However, the researcher was not able to interview the chosen couples who recently
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
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got married through ‘kalon’ because these individuals were not present during the data
gathering.
Changes in the Practice of Kalon
All the respondents stated that there were many changes occurred in the practice of
‘kalon’. These changes were noted in Table 8.
According to the key informants, these changes are usually observed during the ‘kalon’.
Instead of rice wine or ‘tapey’ as a material used by the ‘mengalon’, any liquor, usually
4x4, is used. According to Esnara, this is due to unavailability of ‘tapey’ during ‘kalon’.
‘Tapey’ takes an effort to be produced; thus, its availability during immediate ‘kalon’
may not be available.
In terms of the woman or man’s refusal to be married using the parent’s decision as an
approach, today’s ‘kalon’ respects the decision of their child. Some respondents
Table 8. Changes applied in the practice of ‘kalon’
Old Practice
Present Practice
Marriage is officiated by a ‘mambunong’ At the night of the wedding, the couples
or an elder and the marriage rites are done are positioned in one corner of the house
at the house of the girl.
then the elders do the ‘bah’diw’.
‘Bah’diw’ is the form of ‘bilin’ to the
couples.
Marriage done by elders is said to be The marriage is officiated by either a
enough tie or bond for the couples to be priest, pastor, mayor or judge and the
called legally married, there is no need for marriage rites are done in churches, some
official papers from the church or the may occur also in the woman’s house but
registrar’s office
still it is officiated by a priests (garden
wedding). The reason for this change as
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stated by Buslay, one of the key
informants is that because of one’s
religious belief system. Pagan rites are
slowly vanishing and the Christian beliefs
and ways replaced these ideals.
The proposal is rarely aborted because of Everyone says that it is still necessary that
the respect/obedience of the woman to the couples should get a certification of
elders (‘mengalon’). Also, as stated by marriage from the municipal registrar’s
Buslay, one of the key informants, the office and if they got married in church the
woman before was afraid of the cursed of couples should also have a church
Toribio, one of the key informants, he said orientation/confirmation. According to
that people today are educated; thus, they freedom and rights since almost all of
already know how things are being done them were educated.
following a process considered as “legal”
in this present generation.
The proposal can be freely aborted. The ‘Bilin’ is integrated at the wedding
woman or individuals today can assert program, after having lunch. The ‘bilin’
their right to say “No” to the ‘kalon’ offer. can be done by the ninonngs/ninangs of
As stated by some of the respondent’s the couples, elders and respected
individuals in the community. They
women today are more assertive of their
would speak some pieces of advice for
the couples fr the betterment and progress
of their marriage life. Some may also do
it through a song.
During the ‘kalon’ , rice wine (tapey) is Any liquor usually 4x4 is the liquor
offered to the woman as a sign of “yes” offered to the woman. The reason for the
answer to the ‘mengalon’.
replacement of ‘tapey’ into 4x4 is that
‘tapey’ takes an effort to be produced;
thus, its availability during immediate
‘kalon’ may not be available.
The wedding expenses are sponsored by The wedding expenses are financed by
the ‘mengalon’ or elders who were the couples.
involved during the ‘kalon’.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
said that woman today are more assertive of their freedom and rights since almost all of
them are educated. As stated by Catalino, one of the respondents, “if the old practice says,
obey what the parents or elders say, children of today are already entitled to their own
decision and that they can correct their parents if they think their thoughts are correct
(translated statement).”
Furthermore, a ‘mambunong’ or elders no longer solemnize marriage instead; it is
officiated by a priest, pastor, mayor or a judge. As stated by Buslay, one of the key
informants, one’s religious belief system is the reason why this old practice is changed.
Pagan rites like the marriage through ‘mambunong’ are slowly vanishing while the
Christian beliefs and ways replaced these ideals. This finding is supported by the article
of NCIP (2012) that because of the changes in belief systems like the adoption of the
Christian faith, some processes and systems in cultural practices would no longer practice.
Meanwhile, marriage done by the elders is said to be enough to tie or bond the
couples to be called “legally married”, but in this time, couples are required to get a
certification of marriage and church confirmation if married in church. Toribio, one of the
key informant, said that people today are educated; thus, they already know how things
are being done following a process considered as “legal” in this present generation. He
also added that the other reason for the changes is modernization. This was supported by
the statement of Awas (2009) in his study entitled: Staged Bendian as a Medium of
Community Dialogue and Action for Development and Cultural Integrity in
Contemporary Kabayan, Benguet, Philippines that as culture is ever-dynamic so it
changes with the modern time (modernization).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Also, before, at the night of the wedding, the couples are positioned in one corner
of the house with the elders doing the ‘bah’diw’ as a form of ‘bilin’ to the couples but
now, the ‘bilin’ is done during the wedding program, usually after after having the lunch.
Wedding expenses are also sponsored by the couple and not the ‘mengalon’ or elders who
initiated the engagement.
Vanished Processes in the Practice
These vanished processes were practiced during the early 1960s, according to
Albis; thus, the following activities were not observed during the time of the couples
interviewed in this study. It can be noted that the couples interviewed for this study did
not mention such however, they were knowledgeable of these vanished practice in the
process of ‘kalon’.
After the ‘ngilin’. After the five days of ‘ngilin’, the couples go out to their house.
The woman goes to the farm to get ‘camote’ sweet potato or harvest rice in the fields
while the man goes in the forest to get wood. When they arrive at home, the man passes
his gathered woods to the woman and the woman passes also his harvested ‘camote’ or
rice to the man. After this, the couple takes a bath at their yard at the same time and utter
prayers for their long life. According to Lideng Tomino, one of the key informants, this
symbolizes that whatever problems or difficulties the couples will undergo they will still
help each other. In addition, it will symbolize progress in their life.
With cases of pre-marital sex. According to Lourdes Dalgis, one of the respondents,
another vanished process in the practice is when the man and woman had pre-marital sex
before the marriage. If such was the case, they were required to butcher one pig before the
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
wedding. If both parties would not be able to provide one pig, a ‘mambunong’ or an elder
would get one egg, pray for it and burry it on the soil.
The forced practice. When the man does not like the woman, he is tied and ordered
to stay with the house of the woman. In some cases, the man and woman are locked in one
room.
Roles of Elders in the Process of ‘Kalon’
Intermediary. The elders served as intermediary ‘mengalon’ between the man and the
woman. The elder/s talk to the woman in behalf of the man. He/she tries to convince and
persuade the woman to marry the man using his gullible tongue.
Para-piltek ni adak. When the woman wants the man and she agrees to drink the
liquor, the elder would utter a minute of prayer for the couples. This is called ‘piltek’.
Mamilin (Adviser). During and after the ‘kalon’, the elders always advice the
couple to be good to each other, understand each other and give some pieces of advices for
the happiness of the couple. As stated by some of the respondents, this is the reason why
they said that ‘kalon’ is still relevant; the elder’s guidance and advices to the couples they
betrothed is expected. The elders are held responsible for the good relationship of the
couples because they were the one who betrothed them. This result was supported by the
statement of Lewis (2008) that native elders serve as teacher, mentor, family member, wisdom
bearer, traditional healer, and a role model in a community.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Respondent’s Perception in the Practice of ‘Kalon’
Among the 20 respondents of the study, eleven claimed that ‘kalon’ is
advantageous in the community and nine claimed that it is disadvantageous.
Advantages. The key informants and respondents stated different reasons why they
claimed that ‘kalon’ is advantageous. The reasons were as follows: (1) a shy man is
privileged to marry the woman she wants without direct courtship, he asked a help of a
‘mengalon’ or his older relatives; (2) both parties know each other’s family track and that
the couples know each other’s family background because they belong to one community;
(3) “Baaks” ages 35 to 45 or older can still get marry by the help of the ‘mengalon’; (4)
guidance and advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples is always assured because the
elders are held responsible in the couples courtship and marriage; (5) before, there are
many successful marriage through ‘kalon’ because the couples are afraid to separate in
respect of their ‘mengalon’ or elders; (6) rich families are betrothed to a rich family also.
This corroborates with the article of Fialen (2012) as stated by Bugawi that one of the
reasons for the ‘kalon’ practice before was the rich clan and families to keep their wealth
within their class.
The first advantage mentioned is supported by the article of Fialen (2012) as stated
by Lakay Bugawi that “Ibaloi men have become dependent on other person or on their
parents to court the woman they love.” Wara faylaeng e ebadoi ja egto amtan mengeshem,
ambaeng ton ekwan e ayat to isunga talaga emun shy kami mango (There are still Ibaloi
men who are shy to court and express their feelings of love; thus, this practice still exist).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Disadvantages. The nine respondents stated four reasons why they claimed that
‘kalon’ is disadvantageous. These disadvantages were as follows: (1) woman are at times
forced to marry the man she does not love or like to be with and in worst cases, in parents
betrothal, both the man and woman are forced to get marry; (2) love between the couple
is not readily established before marriage, although in most cases, it developed through
the years; (3) sometimes the process of betrothed marriage is the cause of
misunderstandings between the couple.
Perception on its continuation. When the 20 respondents were asked if they think
‘kalon’ is still relevant in today’s generation, majority (11) said that ‘kalon’ is still
applicable and relevant to the community because there are still those ‘baaks’ who are
waiting for the help of ‘mengalon’. There are still elders who pity olden men who are not
yet married thus they encourage them to marry through ‘kalon’. This approach is often
practiced in Tuel. With these statements, it can be said that the practice still has a chance
to be prolonged, though rarely will it happen.
On the other hand, nine of the respondents said that ‘kalon’ is no longer relevant
supposed to be, because the women and men today are the ones choosing their husband.
As stated by Gabriel Toribio, one of the key informants, the forced marriage
through ‘kalon’ before is no longer practiced because woman today are educated,
information about rights and freedom is budding. However practiced, the woman of today
has the full authority to say “no” to the ‘mengalon’. Toribio added that woman already
know how are things be made legal in the name of our written law, like for example before
if the marriage can be officiated by the elders, nowadays the couples are required to get a
legal authorization of marriage either from the church-priest, municipal office-mayor or
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
judge. This was supported by the statement of Narcisa Buslay that pagan rites like the
marriage through ‘mambunong’ are slowly vanishing while the Christian beliefs and ways
change these ideals.
It can be noted from the above findings that ‘kalon’ though already an old aged
custom, is still practiced in Tublay especially in barangay Tuel and generally perceived
as applicable and relevant.
Its relevance was strengthened by one key informant who stated that “angken niman
in-inut ja mangka enshe eh ‘kalon’ wara ladta sota mengedon tan maykalon. Nu waray
as asen ni kakaidian ja mankabaake shaha ekwan wenu mengebetkag ira ey jo kare ikalon
si man sun woman (Even if this practice is vanishing, it will still and still be performed
because if any ‘kakaidian’ community member saw some olden men or women ‘baaks’
or not aging 30’s but don’t know how to court a girl they tell or talk to someone to
betrothed them).
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
SUMMARY, CONCLUSIONS AND RECOMMENDATIONS
Summary
Generally, the study was conducted to document the processes involved in the
practice of ‘kalon’, determine the changes in ‘kalon’ in Tublay, Benguet, determine the
roles of elders in the process of ‘kalon’ , and determine how ‘kalon’ is perceived by the
community of Tublay.
There were twenty respondents of the study, five elders and five who experienced
‘kalon’ served as the key informants and ten community members who know the practice
of ‘kalon’ .
The data were gathered through a personal interview which was conducted from
January 2012 to February 2012.
Ibaloi’s as one tribe in Benguet has many customs, beliefs and traditional practices
which includes which is a way of courtship and marriage.
Kalon in Tublay has three-first approaches, first is through the man’s initiation
wherein the man is the one who chooses the woman he likes, second is the elder’s choice
wherein when the elders notices some olden men and women in the community they
encourage them to marry through ‘kalon’ and the third one is through parents betrothal
wherein the parents agree to inter-marry their siblings. The first two ways have the same
processes during the tulag and the wedding proper. In case of the parent’s betrothal the
parents will be the one to inform their siblings about the visitation in the woman’s house
and during the tulag and wedding proper it follows the same processes in the first tw ways
stated above.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Kalon, just like many other cultural practices, has also changes. Today, the type of
drink used by the ‘mengalon’ is changed by any liquor usually 4x4 instead of rice wine
‘tapey’. The proposal can be null and void unlike before that if the woman dislikes the man,
she is forced. Also there were changes of who officiates the marriage rites who are
authorized to conduct the marriage rites (judge/ mayor, priest/ pastor and the like), and
couples are required to get a marriage certification at the municipal office unlike before
that marriage through elders is enough proof that couples are legally married. The form of
‘bilin’ has also changed, instead of in the form of ‘bah’diw’; it can be only through a simple
speech during the wedding program. In the finance of the wedding, the ‘mengalon’ are no
longer the financer instead the couple themselves.
The roles of elders in the processes of ‘kalon’ includes: being an intermediary
(‘mengalon’/convincer), para-piltek ni adak and adviser (mamilin).
Moreover, 11 of the respondents said that ‘kalon’ is advantageous and nine said
that it is disadvantageous. Based on the results it is advantageous because a shy man is
privileged to marry the woman he likes without direct courtship, both parties know each
other’s family background, olden men ‘baaks’ can get married through , guidance and
advices of the ‘mengalon’ to the couples are rest assured, rich families are betrothed to a
both rich.
Meanwhile, the sated reasons for its disadvantageous is that, women are
sometimes forced, love between the couple is not readily established, and that the process
of force marriage is the cause of misunderstandings between the couples.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
Conclusions
The following conclusions were drawn based on the findings of the study:
1.
How ‘kalon’ is practiced in Tublay is similar with how ‘kalon’ is practiced in other
‘Ibaloi’ communities in Benguet however, differences like a large male carabao is
butchered for the wedding feast is not necessary in Tublay.
2.
The indigenous ways of marriage practice in Tublay, Benguet have changed due to
different factors brought about by different belief systems of the community members,
effect of modernization and education.
3.
There are varied lessons that can be learned from the practice of ‘kalon’ in Tublay,
Benguet.
4.
There is still a high regard on elders in any cultural practices in indigenous
communities and they are considered as source of wisdom and adviser of certain practice.
5. Like in any cultural practices, ‘kalon’ has also its own advantages and disadvantages.
Recommendations
1.
The practice of ‘kalon’ maybe maintained though not all the processes maybe
applied. As stated by some key informants and respondents, there are still those man or
‘baaks’ who are waiting for the approach and help of ‘mengalon’.
2.
High regards to elders in indigenous communities should still be maintained
however, how one must follow maybe taken into its proper context and application.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
3.
Cultural practices like ‘kalon’ should not be looked at as a ‘paganistic’ way of doing
things but should be looked at as a way of creating a harmonious relationship between a
man and woman and/or among members of the community if done and observed properly
and appropriately.
4.
Further study about the impact of ‘kalon’ on women in Ibaloi communities and the
general acceptance of such practice in the community may be conducted in other
Ibaloi communities where ‘kalon’ is still actively practiced.
5.
Further study on cultural practices of Tublay is recommended.
Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013
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Learning from the Past: Processes of Kalon as a Cultural Way of Courtship and Marriage
in Tublay, Benguet | DALGIS, LOURYVIC A. APRIL 2013